Page 115 of Rules of Engagement

"We can only stay for a few minutes," said Garrett. "This isn't an authorized stop and it's risky enough moving him like this."

"Understood," said Solomon. He turned his head to Damien. Damien stood still but after a moment, he sighed heavily.

"I am so sorry," he said, first to Solomon then to me. "I never meant for any of this to happen. I messed up really bad and I couldn't get out of it. I'm so sorry you got hurt, John, and Lexi, I panicked. I would never have deliberately hurt you. The gun went off by accident when Maddox knocked me out."

"We could all have been killed because of your poor choices," said Solomon. "Do you realize that? Me, Lexi, and Anastasia."

"I didn't know they would go after you. I thought they might kneecap me or make me do more stuff for them. I never guessed they'd come after you. I didn't think they even knew about you."

"When did you realize I was your first warning?" asked Solomon.

"Very soon after I got to Montgomery."

"And you didn't say a thing?"

"I was scared. I thought I could make the payoff and finally end it."

"I always thought if anything happened to me, you'd look out for our sister and Lexi. I thought I could count on you and look how you've let me down! Our parents would have been destroyed if they learned that this is what you've become. I am thankful they did not live to see it."

Damien hung his head. "I am too."

"If you had explained it to me at any time, I could have gotten you out of the situation."

"I thought I could handle it."

"I cannot fathom how you could even think that was possible."

"I was so ashamed," said Damien. "I was proud once, and I knew how stupid I was. I didn't know how to ask for help."

"You just spit it out," said Solomon. "It doesn't have to be eloquent. All you had to do was say 'I need help' and I would have gladly helped you."

"I know that now but I couldn't think clearly. I'm trying to change that in the future. I've told Garrett everything he asked me."

"It's a good start," said Solomon.

"Can you forgive me?"

Solomon looked toward me and I kept my face impassive. It wasn't up to me. "I don't know," he said. "You very nearly destroyed my life. If the gang had taken Lexi from me, that would have killed me. How can I forgive that?"

"What can I do?"

"Keep doing what you're doing now," said Solomon. "Tell Garrett every detail you can think of and when the court date comes up, take the stand and speak clearly and loud. You make sure the jury hears every word you have to say."

"Thank you."

"Don't thank me, thank Lexi and Garrett. You only got this deal because of our connection to them, otherwise you'd just be another dirty cop facing jail time. You owe them your life and more. Don't ever dishonor it."

"I won't."

Solomon turned and took a step, then he stopped, half turning back. "Good luck, Damien," he said.

Damien looked up. "Will I ever see you again?"

Solomon walked away and this time, he didn't look back.

"I'm so sorry, Lexi," said Damien, looking at me. "I wish I could change everything."

"I believe you," I said, "but I don't forgive you. You hurt the man I love and he could have died. Maybe one day, I'll forgive you, but not yet."

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