Page 107 of Knot Happening Again

Leon flinches as if I've slapped him. He opens his mouth to respond, but I hold up a hand, silencing him.

"No," I say, my voice steadier than I feel. "I listened to you. Now it's my turn."

I stand up, needing to move, to put some distance between us. The room suddenly feels too small, too confining. I pace to the window, staring out at the city lights twinkling in the distance.

"Do you have any idea what it was like?" I ask, not turning around. "To wake up alone, marked but unclaimed? To feel the bond forming and then... nothing?"

I hear Leon shift in his seat but don't give him a chance to respond.

"I waited for you," I continue, my voice barely above a whisper. "For days, I waited. I thought maybe you'd gotten scared, that you just needed time. But you never came back."

I turn to face them, my arms wrapped tightly around myself. "My parents were furious. They wanted to know who had ruined their perfect little omega. But I couldn't tell them. I couldn't bear to see the disgust in their eyes if they knew I'd given myself to someone who didn't want me. To the very man I was promised to. The one they'd pinned all their hopes and dreams for my future on. The one who gave me worth in their eyes. And even then, even after what you did, there was a part of me that wanted to protect you. To shieldyoufrom the fallout you subjected me to."

Leon looks like he's just been stabbed, but I press on. This little diatribe has been years in the making. And I'm not kicking him in the balls with every word like I originally imagined, so he should be grateful. "So they threw me out," I go on. "Cut me off completely. I had nothing, Leon. No money, no home, no future. And worst of all, I had this... this constant ache. This emptiness where you should have been."

I watch as the color drains from Leon's face, guilt etched into every line of his body. But I can't stop now. Years of pent-up anger and pain are pouring out of me like a dam breaking.

"Do you know what it's like to go through heat with a partial bond? It's agony. Suppressants barely touch it. I tried everything to make it stop, to make the pain go away. But nothing worked. Nothing except..."

I trail off, shame burning hot in my cheeks. I don't want to say it, don't want to admit how low I'd sunk. But Leon seems to understand anyway. Horror dawns in his eyes.

"Ophelia," he breathes. "I never meant?—"

"Of course you didn't mean for it to happen," I snap. "You didn't mean for any of it to happen. But it did. And I had to live with the consequences."

I turn back to the window, my arms wrapped around me. "I hated you for so long," I admit quietly. "I hated you for makingme love you, for making me believe in something beautiful, only to rip it all away."

The room is silent save for the ticking of the grandfather clock. I can feel their eyes on me, waiting. I take a deep breath, steeling myself for what comes next.

"But I'm tired of hating you, Leon," I say, turning to face him again. "I'm tired of letting what you did define my life. It's bad enough I have this mark as a constant reminder." He flinches at that, but has the decency to say nothing. "If forgetting you was an option, I would have taken it a long time ago, but since it's not. I want to move forward."

Leon's eyes widen, a flicker of hope crossing his face before he quickly suppresses it. "What are you saying?"

I move back to the sofa, sitting down next to Rhys. His presence is comforting, grounding me as I struggle to find the right words.

"I'm saying that I want to try to make things work," I say slowly. "Not between us, but for this pack." I glance at Rhys, offering him a small smile. "They've shown me kindness when I thought there was none left in the world. They've offered me a home, a family. I want that. I want to belong somewhere again."

There's no denying that.

Leon nods, his expression a mix of relief and resignation. "I understand. I'll pack my things and?—"

"No," I interrupt. "That's not what I mean. I don't want you to leave the pack, Leon. I know pushing you out of the picture completely wouldn't just hurt you. It would hurt them, too. Especially Rhys."

"Ophelia, that's not?—"

"Please," I say, holding his gaze. "I've thought about this. I know the pain of a severed bond, and that's not something I could ever inflict on someone I care about. I couldn't live with that, so please, don't ask me to."

Both alphas stare at me in shock. Rhys seems at a complete loss for words, even though I can tell he wants to argue. I take a deep breath, pushing through my own discomfort.

"I don't want you to leave, Leon," I repeat, the words feeling strange on my tongue. "That's not why I agreed to this meeting."

Leon's brow furrows, confusion evident in his light brown eyes. "I don't understand. If you don't want an apology, and you don't want me to leave, then why?—"

I cut him off, my voice steady despite the tumult of emotions churning inside me. "I didn't ask you here because I wanted your apologies. You're right, there was a time when I would have given anything to hear them. When you coming back to rescue me was all I dreamed about." I pause, swallowing hard against the lump in my throat. "But that time has passed. That girl is gone."

The room falls silent, the weight of my words hanging heavy in the air. I can feel Rhys's warmth beside me, his presence a silent support as I continue.

"However," I say, meeting Leon's gaze, "despite the fact that I have no interest in rekindling what we once had, I also have no interest in being the thing that breaks up this pack."