Page 72 of The Daughters of Nyx

Part of me felt like I should have been embarrassed, especially of the fuzzy socks and messy bun, but I didn’t feel that kind of shame around these people. It was strange, and I couldn’t explain it, but I felt no judgement from them as I tucked myself into the corner of the couch.

“What’s up?” I asked, trying to be flippant as hard eyes fell on me.

Oh, shit. Had something happened? Was there another attack? I sat up straight, opening my mouth to ask, but Maeve held up her hand. “How long have you been experiencing flares of magic?”

I stiffened, and my eyes flickered to Adrian, who stood towards the back of the team. He wouldn’t meet my stare. Had he told them? No, he wouldn’t have, would he?

Turning back to Maeve, I replied, “I think the first time was after you guys arrived. I was with Thea, it came at the end of a panic attack.”

There was no point in lying, but the judgement I hadn’t felt before suddenly flooded me.

“And?” she pressed, crossing her arms. I finally noticed the tablet in her hand.

“Halloween, it happened again. Not to the same extent. It was different. And it sort of made an appearance last night, but I held onto it.” Meeting Maeve’s eye, I bit my lip. “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything, but at first I didn’t know anything about it. And when I did…”

Maeve’s hard eyes didn’t move from me. “I take it Adrian explained it to you, on Halloween. And even he decided to keep it from us.”

My gaze flickered to him again; his jaw was clenched, but he looked at me apologetically, though I couldn’t tell if it was because he’d revealed my secret, or for something else.

“I didn’t want to have to pack up my life and leave yet,” I admitted, jutting my chin. “And I told Adrian that I would go, willingly, if I could just have a bit more time.”

Maeve finally took her eyes off me and looked over at the mage. “Is this true?”

His gaze swept over me before landing on the vampire. “Yes. I expected keeping her secret would proveourloyalty to her, so she could trust us to get her back to Avalon.”

My heart thundered from the betrayal. I’d asked him to keep a secret that I had no intention of hiding for long, and not even that could be respected.

I’d been foolish trusting him again. He’d had no intention of keeping my secret, had he?

Deep down, I understood in some way that telling the team would not only protect them, but protect everyone

around me. Even if I didn’t fully understand the whole timeline of mytransition, it had been obvious the other night that I wasn’t keeping to their initial schedule.

They likely had no idea what to expect from me now, and probably needed to pawn me off to their current Queen sooner rather than later.

Anger boiled in my stomach as I looked away from the team. Despite everything—getting close to Adrian, befriending Rowan, even the softness Elias had shown me, and the time Maeve had spent teaching me to defend myself—I was still a job to them. A mission. Their apparent future Queen.

I closed my eyes and sucked in a deep breath. “Is that all? Are you guys finished berating me?”

“Ivy—” Maeve cut herself off. “What you’re exhibiting isn’t usual for someone this early in their transition, according to Queen Greer. You must understand that we are not equipped to handle this.”

“Just tell me what you plan to do so I can get my life in order,” I snapped, standing from the couch. I regretted my tone almost immediately when I finally met Maeve’s gaze again. “There’s not much I can say now to change your minds, right? So I’ll listen. I won’t fight you on this, not right now. So go, make your plans.”

I turned away and squeezed my eyes shut. Last night, I’d controlled the power, but would I be able to do that again? I’d barely contained the burning fire that had washed over me on Halloween. And before that, at the bookstore, it had felt like somethingelsehad been in control of it.

Two nights in a row, the magic had coursed through me. I could almost feel its tingle in the tips of my fingers, a

warning of something explosive, so I clamped down on the rush of betrayal and guilt and anger swarming around my head. I pushed them aside.

Focus on what I could control. On the tasks I could safely and easily complete while I awaited their judgement.

I could hear the team say something, but I blocked them out as I started for my bedroom. Each step felt like walking through sludge. I almost laughed at how quickly everything had fallen apart. I stopped being old Ivy the moment I ran into Rowan on the sidewalk, and I hadn’t realised then just how crazy my life would turn out.

“Ivy.” Rowan’s voice was filled with something almost like uncertainty, but I couldn’t look at him or the supes filing out of my apartment. I just wanted to curl up with a book and forget about the world, especially after last night, butno.

Teeth gritted, I rolled my shoulders and shook my head. “I’m not in the mood, Rowan.”

I could feel his heat before he touched me; the flesh of my arms prickled as I awaited his touch, a slither of fire burning down my shoulder from where he rested his hand. There was comfort and warmth in that touch, a bout of lust I couldn’t deny, and a need to know if he felt the same way I did, despite it all.

---