Page 43 of Botched

What now?

Chapter Twenty-Nine

AURORA

Considering what I do for work, it’s not abnormal to have a weird day. Today topped the weirdness, though. Between fucking Theo, the awkward run-in with Austin, the bomb of a segment with Austin, and then Theo disappearing to talk to Nathan, all I want to do is melt into my hotel bed and think about nothing. Sounds a lot better than getting lost in my head, full of regrets, desires.

I shouldn’t have slept with Theo. I shouldn’t have liked it. I shouldn’t crave all the things that he did to me, all the things he could do to me.

I roll onto my stomach, burying my face in my pillow. I need to stop thinking about it. But I can’t. Every time I close my eyes, I replay things. The way his mouth felt on my pussy, the little whimpers he made, how he made me feel fuller than anyone ever has before.

My ex, the only guy I’ve really dated, used to roll his eyes whenever I asked him to go down on me. Theo dropped to his knees and begged to eat my pussy, fucking drooled over me. My ex wasalways a quick fuck. Sex with him felt like just another thing on my to-do list. I can imagine having sex with Theo for hours and—fuck!

This is the opposite of forgetting about it.

A knock on my hotel door gets my attention. I slowly sit up and walk over, peeking out the peephole. A sigh escaped the lips. Why won’t the devil get off my back? Is a break from him too much to ask?

I debate on whether I’m going to answer it before I finally give into the niggling desire in the back of my skull that wants to see him.

“Yes?” I ask as I open the door.

Theo grins at me, a sparkle in his brown eyes, almost like I didn’t run away from him after sex. He’s still so goddamn handsome too. “Got ya something, baby doll.” He hands me two sloppily put together bouquets of red roses. It looks like one bouquet was removed from its plastic wrapping and shoved into the wrapping of the other one so they could form a bigger bundle.

Taking the flowers, I raise an eyebrow. “Why?”

He doesn’t answer me, instead he holds up a finger. “But wait, there’s more.” With a grin still plastered on his face, Theo hands me a small purple cardboard box.

My eyes widen when I look down, reading the text on the box. He bought me the morning after pill. “Really?”

“I don’t want any little fuckers running around. I don’t know your birth control status. I didn’t use a condom earlier. Wanted to be on the safe side, ya know?”

“I don’t know whether I’m charmed or offended.”

“You can be both.” He shrugs. “I will have you know that I spent a solid minute searching the internet to figure out what the best ‘I’m sorry’ flower is. Red roses seemed popular.” Theo puts his hand on the doorframe, leaning in a little bit. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you after.”

“Probably not,” I agree. To be fair, I don’t think I handled everything after the best either. I shut him down, immediately got defensivebecause accepting it felt like a step too far. Denial is a comfortable place to stay in.

“But you should know that you can’t run from it, Roo. This,” he gestures between us with his finger, “is inevitable.”

My gut clenches at his words. Dread and desire swirling together like it always seems to do when Theo’s involved. I don’t want him, but I do. I take a deep breath, needing to hold myself together. I bring my hand up to his chest and give him a gentle shove out of my doorway.

“We’re not,” I say. “Nothing between us is ‘inevitable.’”

He tilts his head, looking down at me. “Why are you so desperate to deny it, Roo? I don’t get it. If I can feel it, you can feel it too.”

That’s the problem. Icanfeel it. But I have enough sense to be able to look at it logically too. I can give in, and what happens? Maybe we’re good for a few months until Theo gets bored of me, then he’ll discard me. Just like every girl before me. Just like Veronica.

Even if the strongest part of me is eager to fall into it, I also know better.

Using your head really fucking sucks sometimes.

I sigh, clutching the roses in my hand. “Theodore, what happened earlier was a mistake. It can’t happen again.”

He raises his brows at me, not bothering to shield how unhappy he is with my words. “A mistake? You’re really aiming to hurt my feelings, baby doll. Ouch.” There’s still a playfulness lacing his words as he leans against the doorway again. He’s blocking it with his hand so I can’t slam it in his face.

Theo knows me a lot better than I want to give him credit for.

“I’m serious.” I sigh. I don’t want to be a bitch. For some reason, hurting Theo makes me feel bad. He’s an asshole, but there’s more to him underneath that facade, even if he wants to deny it. “We work together. You’re…you. This can’t happen.”

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