Page 18 of Widow

She laughed, and I looked over at her. Her smile lit up her whole face, and her blue eyes twinkled in the lights from the highway. Jesus, I really didn't need this.

"I have family in West Virginia. But I choose not to see them. They're pretty fucked up." She leaned her elbow on the door and looked out the window. "Sometimes it's just not worth the stress, you know? I've tried, but a relationship with them is just not in the cards."

"At one point in time, I felt that way about my brothers. It's complicated. Now, I can stand to be around them." It was hard explaining my world to her without giving her too many details. I had no blood relations besides Danica. "Why isn't a woman like you married with kids?"

I saw her shrug in my peripheral vision. "I don't know. I've never really had the desire. I was married once, and it was one time too many."

I turned off the highway, and we rode in silence until I pulled into the beach parking lot. I put the car in park and turned off the engine.

"Sometimes I come out here to think when I have a lot on my mind. It seems you have a lot on your mind."

"That's the understatement of the century." She shifted in her seat and unbuckled her belt. "Why the abrupt one-eighty? One second you seem to hate me, and now you're acting like you're my friend."

I didn't know how to answer that, so instead, I slid out of the car and walked towards the sand. I heard her get out of the car and grumble to herself.

I stopped where the cement met the sand, took off my shoes and socks, and rolled up my pant legs. I looked over my shoulder and saw her walking towards me, slipping her arms into a jacket. I forgot that humans felt cold more than angels.

"Don't you think it's a little cold?" Despite her question, she kicked off her shoes and removed her socks.

"Not really. I don't really feel the temperature that much." That's how I always got away with wearing suits because I could never feel how hot it was, even when it was one-hundred degrees outside.

"Are you going to tell me what you are? Ric already told me he's a wolf shifter. From another planet? He wasn't clear on that. I had to read between the lines. He wanted warm cow's milk this morning for breakfast." She laughed and walked beside me as I made my way onto the sand.

It felt good beneath my feet. I didn't usually walk around without shoes on unless I was at the beach or getting ready for bed. Lately, there hadn't been a lot of either. I didn't like to sleep. That was when the memories haunted me.

"He's not from another planet. It's hard to explain. I guess the easiest explanation is that it's a parallel realm called Inferna." I wasn't about to tell her that Hell was part of Inferna.

I found a spot in the sand and sat down. She stopped beside me and looked down at me. My heart thudded in my chest. She seemed to be thinking about whether or not she wanted to sit down. I hoped she did.

She looked out at the crashing waves and sighed. "Sometimes, I wonder if I should just force the spiders out of myself. It can't be that difficult. There has to be a way to piss them off enough to come out. Then maybe I could run from them."

She sat down beside me and drew her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. She laid one of her cheeks on her knee and looked over at me.

I mulled over that idea. She probably could get them out, but they might continue to find her. "I'm not sure that would work. You seem to be their host."

"I've thought about different ways to kill myself and the spiders. It's kind of hard not to think about it when you wake up from a blackout and then realize you killed somebody. Maybe that person deserved it a bit, but who am I to make that judgment?" She shut her eyes, and a tear slid down her cheek.

The conversation had gotten deep really quickly.

"It's not you that's making the decision. You can't blame yourself. If you do, it'll eat you alive."

I was such a hypocrite. Once I found out that my Lily was actually Lilith, that she had fooled me into giving her my heart, I blamed myself for the world almost ending. Although, I guess it wouldn't have ended, there just would have been a lot of demons running around raising hell.

I knew exactly how she felt. She was a prisoner in her own body. She was probably wondering if the pain was even worth it, especially since she didn't have anyone in her life.

At least when I was imprisoned and tortured by someone I had once loved, I could think about my daughter, Danica. She was the only thing that pulled me through.

"You're really going to try to help me?" Her voice was soft, and she opened her eyes to look at my face. Her eyes were locked on mine.

"We're going to try. And if we can't figure out a way to free you, then…"

She nodded and looked back out at the waves. Her blonde hair was pulled back in a ponytail, but several strands had come loose and fallen across her cheek. I reached out and brushed them behind her ear.

She shivered at the gesture, or maybe it was because it was so cold. Her nose and the tips of her ears were turning pink. I sent a wave of warmth towards her, and her eyes widened.

"You are the one doing it." She didn't move away, despite the look of fear on her face. It softened quickly. "Thanks."

I watched as she went back to gazing out at the ocean, and then she tilted her face to the sky. "It's so clear tonight."

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