Page 47 of Sophia, Property of Tracker

I mean it’s not his fault that she came here tonight, but still, it hurts to know that he’s been with another woman and has had a child with her. He seemed surprised, and I want to believe he never knew, but it’s incredibly hard when you haven’t been part of this life every day. He’s always kept me separate from his club life, and now I just don’t know what sort of past he has and who he’s been with.

A knock sounds at the door, and my head spins to it.

“Babe, it’s me. Let me in.”

It’s Ryan, and I panic. I’m not ready to talk about this. My heart beats so fast that I can feel it pounding in my chest.

Another swift knock, but this time it’s harder.

“Soph, I know you’re in there. Let me in.”

The knob of the door creaks with each turn of him trying to open it. It’s quiet for a minute, but then I can hear keys being fumbled in the door lock, and then I realize what an idiot I am—of course, he has keys to his bedroom.

The door opens slowly, and he steps in and shuts it behind him. Leaning up against the door, he crosses his ankles and arms in front of his chest with concern written all over his face. He stands there silent for a moment with his eyes firmly on me. For some reason, I swallow hard, not knowing what to say, and by the looks of it, he doesn’t either. His chest rises with each deep breath, and I can tell he is nervous. He doesn’t know how to raise the subject, and honestly, I don’t want him to. I don’t think I can talk about this with him tonight.

I can’t.

I won’t.

I’m too tired from the day’s events.

I just don’t have the energy to have a deep conversation because, believe me, this is going to be deep.

Finally, he breaks the silence. “Sophia, can you please listen to me?” he asks, his voice low and cautious. He kicks himself off the wall and walks toward me.

“Stop!” I state. “Just leave me alone.”

He freezes a couple of steps away and runs his hand down the back of his neck. He takes another step and then falls to his knees in front of me. Ryan places his hands on my thighs, and I shove them away, not wanting him to touch me.

“Baby, we need to talk this out. You have to believe me… I didn’t know about the kid, and anyway, we don’t even know if he is mine.” His eyes look at me with concern. “Sophia, please, say something.”

I jump to my feet and walk over to his closet where I stored my bag. Grabbing it, I walk back to the bed and place it on there and begin to shove my clothes inside.

“What are you doing? You need to stop,” Ryan orders, placing his hand on mine to prevent me from continuing with my packing.

Removing his hand from mine, I continue in silence. Turning around, I head to the bathroom, grab the toiletries I had taken out not long ago to shower, and walk back to the bed, throwing them inside.

“Sophia, will you please listen and stop that? I’m begging you.”

Tears now roll down my face because I want to listen to him, but I just can’t. I don’t want to hear about Tash and their relationship and how they made a baby together. And I don’t want to hear excuses about how he didn’t know, and maybe he didn’t, that much is obvious, but I’m upset, and I need to lick my wounds and be alone right now.

Just as I place the last item in my bag and go to zip it up, Ryan lifts my bag and empties its contents on the bed.

“What the hell, Ryan. Why did you do that?”

He grabs my arms, pulling me against him. His scent of soap and cologne hits me, and I begin to tremble in his arms.

“Baby, you’re shivering. Sit down.”

Doing as he says, I take a seat on the end of the bed and let the floodgates open, crying in my hands. I can’t stop the damn tears. All I can do is let them fall, unable to control myself. Minutes go by, and finally, I remove my hands from my face finding Ryan on his knees before me once again.

“I’m sorry you heard what Tash said. You believe me, don’t you? I had no idea about this kid. I doubt he’s mine anyway.”

“Stop! Just stop, please. I can’t bear to listen to this.” I stand again and shove my clothes and items back into the bag. “Don’t try and stop me, Ryan. I need to be alone.”

“But, Sophia, you can’t let her get between us. She means nothing to me.”

Zipping up my bag, I face him and inhale. “So a woman you obviously had a relationship with who could have given birth to your son means nothing to you. That’s just great, Ryan.”

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