That’s when I take a good look at her—she’s beautiful with her long dark hair, immaculate makeup, long eyelashes, and lean legs that go on forever. I used to wonder what I had over Shelley. Zane used to tell me how she’d be on her cell most of the time they were together either Instagramming or Facebooking images of them as a couple, just to gain attention. He felt she was more about the image of them being together rather than her wanting to be with him.
“I never stole Zane from you. He chased me.” I stop and glare at Shelley, then remember she’s not worth it. I’m exhausted from not sleeping and from trying so hard to pretend everything’s okay when it’s not. I can’t handle another argument, when right now, I’ve got other issues to deal with.
“You know what, Shelley? It doesn’t matter. You nor Zane matter because next year I won’t have to see your faces ever again.” I storm past her, not giving her another chance to say anything and leave the ladies’ bathroom with Diane and Stacey close behind me.
“Hey, babe, are you okay?” Zane’s startles me as I exit. He’s standing against the wall, leaning back with his feet crossed at the ankles and obviously waiting for me. Zane pushes himself off the wall and walks to me. He cares, I know he does, but he’s not who I need right now. I need to be alone and at home in a safe place.
“Listen, Zane, I don’t want to hurt you, but I’ve told you we’re over.”
Glancing at Diane and Stacey beside me, he asks, “Would you mind giving us a second?”
Diane turns to me and asks, “Do you want us to stay?”
Dammit! I want to say yes, but I need to have this conversation with Zane. There’s no use in him thinking we’re going to get back together because we’re not.
“No, I’m okay. I’ll come and find you when I’m done.”
“Okay.” Stacey and Diane walk ahead and leave Zane and me in the corridor.
I lean up against the wall and take in a deep centering breath, ready to have this talk once and for all with Zane.
“Lexi, I miss you. I want things to go back to the way they were.”
I look up at him, his blue eyes showing sincerity. “Zane, we’ve spoken about this. With me going to Harvard and you going to NYU, it’s just not going to work.”
“Fuck that! We can make it work. I love you, Lexi,” Zane says as he places his hands on the wall on either side of me trapping me in.
I gather my courage together and blurt out, “But I don’t love you, Zane.”
Zane’s head shoots back, his eyebrows raise, and his eyes become wide. “Come on, babe, stop lying to yourself.” His hand comes up to cup my face.
I inhale. “I’m not. I’ve got no reason to lie. I just don’t love you like that.” I place both hands flat on his chest and move in closer. “You’re a great guy… any girl would be lucky to have you.”
Grasping my hands in his, he states, “It’s not you but me, right? Isn’t that what you’re going to say?”
“Well…” I trail off, not knowing how else to explain it. “I guess it is me. I’ve just got so much happening in my life right now that I don’t have time for any sort of relationship.”
I know I’ve hurt his pride because his jaw clenches, and he lets go of my hands, allowing them to drop by my sides.
“You know what? I thought you were different. I never saw you as frigid.”
“A what?” I shout, not recognizing my own voice. To be honest, I am stunned by his words.
Now, I’m mad.
“You heard me,” he replies, moving back. His eyes travel the length of me and then back up again. “You always were a tease.”
Fuck, no, he didn’t just say that!
“You asshole.”
“Yeah, maybe I am, but you’re the one who led me on. All those nights you said you were ready to have sex, we’d get close and then you’d pull back. You’re nothing but a cock-teasing frigid—”
I slap him full force feeling the sting on my hand from it. “How dare you!” As I go to yell something else, Shelley and her posse exit the bathroom.
Shelley turns to us with her arms folded, excitement glittering in her eyes. “Oh, what’s this? A lover’s quarrel?”
I look at Shelley, then at Zane. “You know what? You can have him. You two are perfect for each other.” Then, without another word, I storm away from them before I end up slapping Shelley too.