Page 110 of Born of Ice

Silly girl…as if I could exist without her. As if I wouldn’t drown in my anger without her calm.

She is too out of it when we arrive, so I carry her inside, undress her and slip behind her in our bed as we fall asleep with one last thought on my mind.

How soon will I lose her when she realizes she belongs on that ice and goes back to her old life?

But no matter how much it will hurt to live without her…I’ll never hold her back from her dreams.

Never.

Electra

I woke up this morning with the same fears, but a new resolve. One is to let the fears go. So, I asked Exton to take me to Stella’s ice rink.

Only that was done without really thinking it through. And now I am. Thinking, that is.

I’m insane. What am I doing here?

It’s been about a week since my appointment with Dr. Miles and every day Exton works my legs more and more, gettingthem stronger and ready to be back to normal. We’ve made great progress and so I thought I was ready to try.

What in the hell made me think that?

“Remind me again, why did I think this was a good idea?” He chuckles while lacing up my skates. God, that shouldn’t look so sexy, yet Exton Quinn on his knees with my small foot in his giant palms as he works the laces, is undeniably sexy. Hot.

“Seeing as it’s barely six in the morning I have the same question,” he grumbles, shaking his head. He’sbeengrumbling since I woke him up at four, giving him nonsense about the ice and how it’s been calling me, and I knew I had to be here but now I’m rethinking the sanity of my “new resolve.”

But I did. Hear it calling me, that is. In my dreams, I heard it, I felt the cold seeping through my veins, but it was one I welcomed. One I looked forward too every time I stepped onto the ice and gave it my all.

Now, the other type of cold settles over me as I watch the empty rink while my body is on fire for him.

Will I ever stop being this crazy about Exton? Something tells me it’s a firm no or maybe it's all of the insane sex we are having.

“I have a better one. Let’s get out of here.” Exton looks at me from underneath his eyebrows at my suddenly breathless tone.

“Don’t tempt me, Electra Monroe.”

I lick my lips. “I’m serious. I’m very serious, Exton. Let’s go home, I want you like right now.”

“Fucking hell, star.” He heaves a heavy sigh, fixing his crotch. “You are so going to pay for that.” I’m already nodding yes when he pushes me up but instead of the hallway, it’s the ice I’m facing. “After,” he adds, coming up behind me and winding his arms around my waist as I stand here, face to face with the one place I always called my home. With the one place, I loved more than anything.

It’s just me and the ice. Nothing in between us. It’s my choice. My first step to make and Exton is there, behind me, landing me his support in case I fall or soar. He’ll be there no matter what and he won’t love me any less no matter what I choose.

Maybe that’s what gave me courage to show up here. To try. To keep fighting.

“You’re thinking too hard.” I turn my head to give him a long look.

“Riveting advice, baby.”

“There’s my angry elf.” He chuckles. “Close your eyes. Come on do it,” he adds when I just stand there and I relent, not sure where he’s going with it, but I’ve learned to trust the man.

“Now what?”

“Now, you feel.”

“Again?” I pop one eye open, about to turn around and look at him when he shushes me and presses me harder into his chest.

“Yes, again. Now, shut up, close your eyes and feel.”

“You’re not very nice for a boyfriend.”