Page 42 of Meet Me in the Blue

“Is that why Bubbe didn’t like Mom?”

He laughed and tipped his head back with a sigh. “Bubbe loved your mother. It took her a while, but she came around. I think she blamed Mom for things she shouldn’t have.”

“Mom wasn’t Jewish.”

“Hell, Bubbe was barely Jewish.” He waved his hand with more strength than I’d seen in days. “The point to this entire story is that love isn’t easy. Love is sacrifice, son. It hurts, it’s messy, and shit, it will tear you up. At the risk of sounding like one of those greeting cards your sister loves to torture us with, I have to say it’s worth it. Love is worth every single hurt it gives. It’s worth it because it’s fucking living, and you deserve to live it.”

I hadn’t realized I was crying until he threaded his fingers through mine. “I’m afraid. What if we don’t make it and I lose him?”

“Impossible.”

“I left. He deserves better.”

“You left. You made mistakes. But you love him, and you’re here now. Mom decided her self-worth and gave away two years to that choice. You know what she said to me last night. She said she’d give anything to have those two years now. You aren’t guaranteed anything, Luka. Tomorrow you could walk out that door and get hit by a bus.”

“Jesus.”

“Well… Macabre as that may be, it’s reality. Don’t you think you’ve thrown away enough years? You don’t get to say you’re not worth it. That’s up to him, and I have a feeling he thinks you’re everything.”

“I want that more than anything.”

He let go of my other hand and rested his head on my shoulder. “Then go get it.”

ROOK

“PORTLAND?”

Luka leaned against the trunk of the tree, ripping up blades of grass between his fingertips, brutal and nervous. The shade of the fort casting shadows across his face. He looked different today, older.

“It’s a good school, Rook. Pacific Northwest College of Art has one of the best photography programs on the west coast. It’s only a two-hour-and-fifty-seven-minute drive from the University of Washington.”

“That’s very specific.”

“I looked it up and it’s not that far.”

“That’s pretty freaking far, Luka.” I plopped down next to him and ignored the ache in my chest. If this was what he wanted, I wouldn’t give him shit for it. “What am I going to do without you?” I asked, hiding my heartbreak with a smile I definitely didn’t feel. “Three hours feels like a thousand miles when I’m used to having you next door.”

“It’s basically the same length of time asThe Fellowship of the Ring.”

“That’s a long-ass movie.”

“I recall you saying it should have been longer.”

“They left out Tom Bombadil.”

“You’re never going to let that go, are you?” His lips broke into an easy lopsided grin as he bumped my shoulder.

“I love Tom,” I half whispered, and we both started to crack up.

“Shit… I’ll miss this.”

The corners of my eyes started to sting. “We still have this summer.”

His hand found mine, his skin warm and soft against my calloused palms. “I promise. Every summer will belong to you.”

• ••

Luka’s name lit up my screen, filling my bedroom with a quiet blue glow. I stared at the text message, not sure if I should respond.

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