Page 8 of Dear Mr. Brody

“Kicking and screaming,” he teased and ordered another round of drinks. “Can we get four shots of whiskey.”

“Whiskey?” I asked.

“Why not?” He shrugged off my arm. “Liquid courage.”

“For what?”

“See, that’s the fun part,” he said. “I don’t know.”

The bartender poured our shots, not spilling a drop. He winked at me as he slid them across the counter. “Enjoy.”

Marcos rolled his eyes and picked up his glass. “Here’s to leather Speedos and hot teachers.”

“And slutty bartenders,” I added.

“I guess I can drink to that.”

We tossed back both of our shots in less than a minute, and as the warmth of the alcohol crawled through me, though I’d never admit it to Marcos, I might’ve snuck another look at Mr. Brody.

Donovan

Overwhelmed. The word circled around my brain as I tried to soak everything in. The club pulsed around me, the lights, the music, the people, all of it too much to process. I couldn’t decide if I was turned on or terrified. I drank in all the half-naked bodies, the men dancing with men, the kissing in dark corners. Picturing myself out on the dance floor, hands, and skin, and sweat, I couldn’t breathe. I wanted it but had no idea how or where to start. It was comfortable here, with a gin and tonic as my shield, standing by the table Lowe Literary had reserved for the party. The alcohol warmed me from the inside out and made it easier for me to smile back at the men who’d pass by me on their way to the bar.

“You’re a popular attraction tonight,” Wilder said out of breath, grabbing a bottle of water off the table. “Half of the guys I invited have asked me if you’re single.”

My face heated and I took a deep sip of my drink. Wilder unscrewed the cap on his bottle and stared at me.

“What?” I asked. “You’re serious?”

“Oh no… you’re one of those guys,” he said, lifting the bottle to his lips.

Intimidated, I avoided his scrutinizing gaze. Wilder was a beautiful man, tall and lean, with thick, curly brown hair that never knew which way it wanted to lay. I had to admit I liked the way he wore make-up sometimes. Tonight, he had a dark shade of blue shadow on his eyes. His skin dewy with sweat, glistened like the sequined letters on his shirt.Gay As Fuck. I loved that he wore his eccentricity like a crown. He was also very married.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Wilder raised a skeptical brow and leaned his hip against the table. “You have no idea how attractive you are. My husband is the same way. Y’all walk around looking like gods, giving all the gays a heart attack, and you don’t even know it.” He nodded his head toward the dance floor where Jax, his husband, was dancing with two women I didn’t recognize. “I mean, look at him, it’s unfair, if I’m being honest.”

Jax was tall with blond hair and big blue eyes. He had a smile that could light an entire room, and it didn’t help that the guy was built with muscle I could only dream about. I looked nothing like him. “Your husband is a gladiator.”

“I know, right?” He grinned and poked me in the chest. “You may not be a gladiator, but you could get any guy in this club if you wanted to. I mean, at least the single ones. All of this…” He waved his hand at me. “Wasted on a straight man.”

“Who said I was straight?” I asked, and he blinked at me a few times. A speechless Wilder was unheard of, and it took me a second to realize what I’d admitted to. I blamed the gin. “I mean… I’m not sure?”

“Is that a question?” His smile widened and he leaned in closer, entirely too excited.

I cleared my throat, my nerves itching at the back of my neck, I tried to rub them away with the palm of my hand. I’d never told anyone about my attraction to men. But as I looked around, this need inside me bloomed. I wanted to experience all of this, to feel free to do what I wanted, to say out loud what I never could before. “I’ve always been attracted to men, but I guess I never had a chance to do anything about it.”

“You’re in the right place, then,” he said. “Or when you’re ready, you could download the Pegasus app. It used to be my favorite. All kinds of guys to choose from.”

“Is that a dating app?”

“Sure,” he said, his lips spreading into a knowing smile before taking another swig of water.

“Wilder…”

“Ugh… fine, it’s kind of a hook-up app, but you can find guys who aren’t just down to fuck. Make an anonymous account and have a look. No one has to know.” He gently shoved my arm. “Live a little. Explore. It’s fun.”

“Maybe I will… Thanks.”

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