Page 34 of Possession

He’s right, she’ll just hurt you again.

Don’t be stupid.

I ignored the voices. My mind was a cage and I was tired of being trapped inside its deceiving walls.

“Yes, I told her I’d be there tonight. Besides, I’ve booked the studio for the week.”

His jaw ticked. “So you’re just going to let her destroy you again. I’m telling you right now, Dex, I can’t go back there with you. You were nearly hospitalized the last time and—”

“I know,” I said in a loud whisper. The people here, they didn’t need the details of my shit.“Hell, I don’t know what’s going to happen, but she looked so broken, and we’ve been through too much. She apologized, she—”

“So that’s it, she walks in, apologizes, and the past nine years don’t matter. What about everything you’ve fucking been through!” He roughly raked his hand through his hair, and his eyes pierced straight through me. “You owe yourself more than that, you were a train wreck and she left you for dead. She fucking married another man, Dex.”

The pressure in my chest consumed the space and my lungs fought to breathe. “I love her.”

“That’s not enough to fix the damage she’s caused.”

“We caused… meandher.I’m just as guilty. I’ll work through this shit on my own, you’re not my damn caretaker, Liam!” Anger colored my words in black and the buzz of the shop had silenced. I turned to look over my shoulder and everyone was staring at us. Kieran, who was sitting at the front desk, shook his head as he looked at us with a disappointed glare.

Liam’s eyes creased around the corners as he winced. “I’ve done everything I can for you, for this family… plan your own goddamn funeral, I’m done.” He stood abruptly and the table scratched against the tile floor. He didn’t look at me again as he walked away.

Kieran stood and moved toward me with sorrow-filled eyes. “We just worry about you, Declan. He’ll be fine, don’t stress it. I’ll talk to him, okay?” He patted me on the shoulder and nodded before he took off after Liam.

Liam had been burned just as badly as I had by love, and I didn’t blame him for hating Paige, for hating Kelly, for hating his life, but I had a chance to heal, and I was fucking taking it.

She’ll cut you open.

She’ll bleed you dry.

Maybe…

But, at least the poison would at last be free from my system and maybe then the death she’d give me would be sweet, because I’d have tasted what it felt like to live again one last time.

Paige’s corn silk strands were balled and twisted and placed on the top of her head in a messy knot. She wore a long black dress, the color at odds with her alabaster skin, but the fabric appeared soft, casual, and it flowed smoothly along the line of her figure. She’d always been petite, her stature delicate, and in the past her curves would’ve filled out the dress just enough, but now the fabric drowned her as she stood in front of her canvas. Paint covered her hands, and had dripped onto the floor and her dress. A smudge of green traced her jawline, and my lips broke into a smile. My chest filled with warmth and my head emptied. All my usual shadows dissolved by the beacon of light before me. Its white hot heat scorched through me as I watched her paint my profile, my eyes, everything in vivid color. She wasn’t the same, but the woman in front of me was just as tragically beautiful as the girl I’d once loved, I still loved.

The music she’d chosen to play wasn’t anything I’d heard before, but it was quiet, light and sweet, and the female vocals lifted as Paige’s lips twitched with a smile. She’d finally noticed my presence. The front of the dress dipped low enough I could see the rise and fall of her breasts as she struggled to breathe. She pulled her bottom lip through her teeth and gave me a nervous wave. My nightmare last night a forgotten horror story.

“Hey,” she said, and her voice, it sounded just as anxious as I felt.

I lifted my chin in greeting as I took a few more steps into the studio. The closer I got the more her scent and the mixture of paint almost dragged me to the past, but I focused on her eyes and how they’d aged with pain, and I remembered, in that moment, that we were two people… broken and battered, meeting for the first time. Everything before this moment couldn’t matter anymore. If I wanted to move on, if I wanted her, I’d have to love this version of Paige, and as her lips trembled, I knew that I could… that I would.

“You found your inspiration?” I asked and she lowered her eyes for a flash before raising them back up to mine.

The honesty shimmered within the azure color of her irises and she spoke, “You’ve always been my muse.” She turned and looked thoughtfully at her canvas. Paige lifted her brush as if to continue to work but stopped and dropped her arm. “It’s unbelievable,” she whispered.

The air was cool inside the studio, and a slight draft stirred the stray pieces of her hair. I rolled my hands into fists in an effort to not reach out and touch her.

“What’s unbelievable?” I asked and took another step closer. My eyes closed briefly, as my nose filled with the scent of rain, the scent of her.

“When I was with Clark, at first, he allowed me to paint.” Her eyes fell to the floor and my shoulders tensed at the word ‘allowed’. “But I had nothing to paint, and I think he enjoyed that I’d lost that part of myself because it was connected to you.” She flicked her eyes to mine and her smile banked the rage that was building in my chest. “I’d thought I’d never paint again, but after all this time, all it took was you, and my mind opened with color and ideas, and after I’d left here last night I was able to see exactly what I wanted to paint.”

She stepped toward me and I brushed my fingers against hers. The paint that coated her skin, red, yellow, and green, was still wet and transferred small splotches onto my knuckles. The promise she offered in her words scared me, but she had to know.

“You never lost it, Paige.” I brought my thumb and forefinger to her chin and tilted her head back so she wouldn’t drop her gaze again. “It’s right in here.” I released her chin and traced my fingertips along her forehead. Her body relaxed under my touch and I wondered what the past nine years had been like for her. “Did he hurt you?”

She nodded. “Not physically, but he broke me, nevertheless.”

She took a step back, and the heat of her body evaporated from between us and her face blanched. Did she still have feelings for him?