Page 6 of Earl

“Apparently it does.”

Lifting their joined hands, she kissed the back of his. “Okay fine. Let’s do this online crap.”

Chapter 2

He was about to give up in exasperation when he spotted something interesting. He had been scrolling through the various profiles and could not believe some of the trite sentences that were tacked on to the profile details.

There were no photos of course, but that was the least of the offence. One person wanted ‘someone to walk in the park with and make love until the sun comes up.’

Another wanted a wealthy man so that she could be secure for the rest of her life.

Some were amusing and some were simply pathetic.

‘I have been single for most of my life and am now at a stage where I desperately need someone to love me. Anyone.’

Shaking his head, Earl was about to get out of the app, when something caught his attention. The tone of the message was slightly truculent as if the writer had been forced to check out the app.

Clicking on it, he opened the entire profile and scanned it quickly, his attention focused on the opening sentence.

‘I am not looking for ‘forever love’ – and for goodness sakes, shouldn’t we be editing before we press send? I cannot tell you the number of grammatical errors I have come across, it is a disgrace. Anyway, my name is Cathy as noted on my profile and I don’t know why the heck I am doing this.

I don’t like long walks in the park during the summer, because it is way too hot, and I am not looking for someone to stoke my ego. If you are likeminded, send me a text or whatever it is you are supposed to do in a case like this.’

He read the sentence again and found himself highly intrigued. Before he could change his mind, he sent her a message.

Fingers poised over the keyboard; he searched his mind for an appropriate response. With a smile wreathing on his face, he started typing.

‘I think we are of a like mind. I don’t particularly love to walk in the summer, and I am pretty certain I can spell most words, and I do edit my work before pressing send. I also have been coerced into going down this dating world.

So, for two people who seemed to have been reluctantly forced into this situation, what do you say we make the most of it?’

He waited a few minutes and did not think he was going to get a response, until he noticed the little dots, indicating that she was typing. Holding his breath, he released it in a whoosh when he skimmed the sentence.

‘Sounds like fun. Where do you want to start? I know we are not supposed to delve too deep on the first meeting, so I guess we could just talk about mundane stuff.

Like why are you really doing this? I know the standard line is going to be, you are too busy to put yourself out there and contend with the humdrum of dating. So, what is the real reason?”

Earl chuckled at her candor and found himself hyped up and ready to have a full-blown conversation.

“You really get to the heart of the matter, don’t you? My sister encouraged me to go this route and yes, I am going to use that line by saying that I am too busy to go the traditional route of dating. What about you?”

He waited with somewhat bated breath to find out if she was going to respond. He had no idea how this worked, but now that he had started, he wanted to continue.

“My best friend roped me into it. Something to the effect that I am wasting away. Mind you, I am only thirty-two, but apparently that’s an age where it is unforgivable to be alone. So, I guess since we are still communicating, this is a match?”

He felt a jolt at that and found himself staring at the words. A match? Shouldn’t he be scrolling through and looking at other profiles? But there was something about this particular candidate that caught his attention.

“I suppose we are.” He typed quickly, not wanting her to think that he was being hesitant or turned off by the idea. “What’s next?”

“We continue talking, I guess. We both agreed that walks in the park during summer are not the thing. What do you like to do?”

He thought on it for a minute, his smile widening.

“Don’t you think we should leave that line of questioning for when we get deeper in the relationship?”

The smile emoji she sent back had him laughing.

“So, it is a relationship now? Wow, you work fast. Well in order to cement this partnership, we need more details to work with. Like how tall you are.”