Page 76 of Second Chance Christmas

“You guys were the perfect couple. I used to love watching him bring home flowers for you every Sunday after church. He said it was because he loved to see you smile.”

“That man knew the way to my heart.” She looked around the place. “There are so many memories here and if we hadn’t listened to our gut back then we would have missed something that turned out more than we could have ever hoped for.”

“My gut lies, doesn’t know north from south and would lead me into a desert to die if I listened to it.” Ivy didn’t mean to sound so depressed, but she couldn’t run from the truth anymore.

Gran laughed until the curlers in her hair bobbed and jiggled. “It’s not that your gut was or is wrong, sweetie, or has a death wish on you. Aspen has made you feel things again and it’s scaring you. Just proves you’re human.” She reached out and patted her hand softly. “It’s that you haven’t stopped to listen. It’s all beengo go goand you never took a step back to reconsider that long-winded plan of yours. To think, is this the right plan for me?”

“I listen all the time. I write down every plan I have.”

“You write down major to-do lists. Your to-do lists have baby lists as if they got together like bunny rabbits and multiplied.”

Ivy harrumphed. She was right and it stung more than a little.

“All that doesn’t mean you really listen to your inner voice or have a plan. Goals maybe, but no real plan on how to get from point a to point b. If you take a beat and listen to what your heart is telling you things would be different. Take it from me, sweetheart, life isn’t all about plans either. Detours happen and some would be missed if you didn’t take a second to consider them. Your gut is the mouthpiece for what really matters to you. It has direct contact with your emotions and brain.”

Gran sat up a little straighter and pointed to her head and heart. “Think of it this way. It’s the mediator between the two. Your planner is only your head talking. What about your heart?”

“Oh.” That made more sense of everything than anything she’d heard in a long while. “I don’t know who I am without my plans or goals, Gran. I’ve needed them for so long.”

“Not true. Did you have a plan for this whole week?”

“Not one.”

“And it turned out just fine. Dig deep, sweetie. Where’s the Ivy that dropped everything to build a gazebo in the middle of the summer with the love of her life? No plans, just having fun with the people she loved?”

Love of her life? He was and she feared he would slip away from her because of that damn Lewis. “That Ivy is buried under a pile of responsibility.”

“Really? Last I checked you worked for yourself. Since when do people selectively choose to stress out their lives consciously?”

She pursued her lips. “You think I’ve done this to myself?”

Gran nodded. “And you can undo it too. You just have to recognize what needs changing and make a conscious decision to do something about it. Sweetheart, what I’m saying is you have the power to change everything. You are your own boss in all the sense of the word. Listen to what your heart says.”

“Oh, Gran. I’ve messed up haven’t I?”

Gran slid from her stool and pulled her in for a hug. “Not at all, my Ivy. You just needed a nudge to look deeper. That’s what old ladies like me are for.”

“Thank God you’re here to kick me in the ass.” Ivy wished her mom could be there and said as much. “Mom would look at us all blubbery with tears and force us to go get our hair and nails done.”

“Your dad married well,” she said, smiling. “She loves you and would tell you the same things I’m saying.”

“I know. I think that’s why she was the ruling power behind getting my ass up here this Christmas.”

Gran swayed as though she agreed somewhat but not entirely. “That might have been a combination of joint efforts.”

“Oh I was ganged up on by my own family? I see how it is.” Gran tightened her hold once more before moving to refill their cups.

“Gran, what about Aspen? After Lewis left last night I couldn’t find him and he’s not taking my calls.”

“He’s not gone, but I wouldn’t waste any time finding him either. Explain what happened. Even if you have to camp out at the fire station.”

She looked out over the lake through the window she’d first spotted Aspen through only a few days before. “Funny how things can change so fast. I didn’t realize how much I miss Dixen and the man I love. Being here has brought me so much happiness. I was scared to death of that happiness and what it meant. Looking back, it meant facing how big of a mistake I made leaving in the first place.” She turned her gaze back to her grandmother. “That it was wrong to feel so much peace here even with all the stress of the work because it didn’t follow my plan.”

“I can see how much passion you have for this place.”

Gran pulled out a doodle from a stack of papers Ivy had left on the side on the kitchen counter. She recognized the black lines and scribbles of ideas immediately. She’d drawn them as she talked with Mr. Langley on the phone last. It was an idea on how to expand the B&B for summer guests with water activities. It included a long dock to extend out over the water, a bigger sunroom downstairs on the east end of the house and garden areas for guests to try their hands at planting and other activities on the other.

“I forgot I drew that.”

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