Page 80 of Harper

“Yeah,” I say, rubbing my stomach absent-mindedly. “He should be here any minute.”

I haven’t seen Joe in person since that rainy night at Centennial Park when I told him everything. We haven’t really spoken either. We’ve just traded texts twice—once when he asked me about this appointment, and once more to confirm that he would be here.

I’m nervous to see him.

I’m scared to see hate in his eyes when I’ve only ever seen love.

“Parker,” says Gran, “there’s a cafeteria inside. Would you go get us four coffees, honey?”

“Sure,” says Parker, getting up from her seat. “I’ll be right back.”

As she heads inside, Gran puts her hand on my thigh and squeezes gently. “You doing okay?”

“I guess.”

“More nervous for the appointment or to see Joe?”

“Do I have to choose?”

“You know, one of the reasons your mama stopped having children after Reeve was because her pregnancies got tougher and tougher.”

“I don’t remember that.”

“She didn’t want to worry you kids, but her doctor told her that Reeve needed to be the last. Reeve’s placenta gave her a good bit of trouble. Not like what happened to you, but there was some blood loss, and she had to have a D&C.”

I look at Gran’s face. “Dad knew?”

“I’m sure he did, but I don’t know how much men really absorb when it comes to stuff like that. I think Emily probably just told him she was done, and Gary agreed.”

“Thanks for telling me,” I say. “I’m sure they’re going to want my complete history, and without Mom here, I’ve got gaps.”

Gran looks beyond me. “Here he comes.”

I turn away from Gran to see Joe walking down the sidewalk toward us. Dressed in cowboy boots, jeans, a white button-down shirt, and sunglasses, he walks tall and proud with his hair braided neatly down his back. My heart swells with love, quickly chased by regret. As I stand up, I feel my hands fist at my sides and tell them to relax.

“Hello, Joe!” calls Gran.

“Hey, Mrs. Stewart,” says Joe. He stops in front of me and nods. “Harper.”

With sunglasses hiding his eyes, I can’t see the contempt that I had tried to prepare myself for. It’s a blessing, but also a curse. Eventually the glasses will come off.

“Hi, Joe,” I say softly.

“We have a few minutes,” says Gran, “and Parker’s getting us some coffee.” She gestures to the bench. “Have a seat, Joe.”

“No, thank you, ma’am. I’ll just—”

“Have a seat,” says Gran, her no-nonsense voice firm. Unyielding.

Joe reluctantly sits down, leaving a good foot of space between us, like I’ll infect him with my poor character if he chances to touch me. Gran gestures to his sunglasses; he pushesthem on top of his head, then she stands in front of us like she’s our principal, and we’re a couple of naughty schoolchildren.

“I want to talk to you two for a second.”

I nod at her. Joe doesn’t say anything.

“Emily Stewart and Sarah Raven were strong, smart women who loved you both beyond any measure,” she says. “If they were here today, I figure it’d be their job to say a word or two. Since they’re not, I feel it’s my duty to stand in their places.” She takes a deep breath and shrugs. “As for what I have to say? You can take it or leave it. Put my advice to use or forget it. That’s up to you. I just need to say my peace.”

“Go ahead, Gran,” I say.

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