Page 55 of A Rogue Cowboy's Kiss

He looked at Bella. “He was my biological father, Bella. His blood runs in my veins. His monster is in my DNA. I?—”

“No.” She grabbed his shoulders. “There is no monster in you, Falcon. Thereisn’t.You are light and sunshine, and that’s why your mom was able to stay clean. For you. Because you’re a healer, remember?”

“I couldn’t heal her. Not from drugs, not from putting up with an asshole, and not from the knife he used on her.” He looked down at his hands that always burned so much. “For a healer, I couldn’t do it when it mattered. So, even if I am one, so what? If I couldn’t do it for her, I’ll never be able to do it for anyone.”

Bella put her hands over his. “You were a little boy,” she said softly. “In survival mode. And you became a man who never forgot the promise he made to his mom to avenge her, and to be the amazing human being you promised her you’d be.”

He squeezed her hands. “When I found him dead, I thought it was over. I don’t know who picked up the game, but I’m tired of it,” he admitted. “I don’t want to do it anymore, but I have to.” He raised her hands and kissed them. “I have to keep going for you, Bella. I had to start it for her, and I will keep going for you.”

She shook her head. “I don’t want you to keep going.”

“Me either, but I can’t let someone hurt you.” He shrugged. “It’s my path. My destiny. I accept it.”

“No. You don’t have to accept anything. Our destinies are never predetermined. No matter how long you have lived a certain life, you can always change it.”

He gestured at his bloody shirt. “Some lives won’t let you go.”

She pulled back and put her hands on her hips. “Are you serious? You’re going to roll over for some life you don’t want? Why would you do that? You want to get married and a have a family?—”

“I willnotendanger anyone?—”

“Hire Dylan. He has a team of badasses who will hunt whoever this is down and get rid of him?—”

“It’smyproblem.”

“No, it’s not! It was never your problem! You made it your problem, and now you have enough money to make it someone else’s problem.” She hit her palm on the steering wheel. “Why are you being so stubborn, Falcon? Just pay someone who’s trained for it, has the resources, and whowantsto do it. How long do you think you’ll last going out there this time, when you don’t want to? You got stabbed already. What if there were two? Or three? Or you were asleep? Do youwantto die?”

“No!” He was shocked by her question. “I’d never betray all those who don’t get to live, by choosing death.”

“Well, you’re choosing to give up your dreams, and your mom sacrificed herself so you could live. And now you’re going to keep living in darkness? Would she want that?”

He stared at her, stunned by her words. “Don’t use my mom against me.”

“I’m not! I’m using herforyou. She’s not here to tell you not to make her sacrifice mean nothing. She would want you to live, and love, and thrive, wouldn’t she? Not to spend your whole life in revenge and then whatever this is you’re planning to do now.”

Anger coiled through him. “You don’t know anything about my mom.”

“I know what you told me about her, and I know that despite all her demons, she managed to raise a man who has a heart of gold, is a freakinghealermeant to bring light into the world?—”

Dammit. He wished he’d never told her about the healer. “I’m not a fucking healer, Bella. I told you.”

She threw up her hands in visible frustration. “No, you’re not. Not if you decide you’re not.”

“I tried?—”

“Did you?” She turned toward him. “I’d give anything to find my path. My identity. My purpose. You’ve been given yours: healer. And you’re just making up excuses not to step into it. What are you so scared of, Falcon?”

“I’m scared of you dying.”

She blinked. “What?”

“My mom died. She was all I had. She died because of me, because I attacked him and she had to save me. You’ve been my heart since I met you. If you die because of me, then…I’ve done it twice.”

“Oh,Falcon.”Bella’s eyes widened, and her eyes glistened with tears. “You’ve been blaming yourself all this time?”

He shrugged. “I take responsibility. It’s not complicated.” Fuck, his side hurt. He closed his eyes, trying to keep the truck from spinning.

He felt her hand on his face. “Falcon. Are you okay?”

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