Page 46 of Under Control

The fear in her voice is deeply unsettling.

“He’s really that bad?”

“Yes,” she says, nodding slowly. “He’s really that bad. I remember those early days before Papa and I ran away. Aram took control of the Brotherhood by killing a series of generals, one after the other, each more vicious and brutal than the next. The whole city lived in terror of him. People were dying all over. We ran because we were convinced we would be next, and if weweren’t, I couldn’t live with the thought of being a part of that monster’s family any longer. Some things happened… he pushed me into a bad situation, despite your father… Well, I don’t like thinking about it anymore. It was terrible, Karine, and I hate myself for bringing it back into our lives. I’m so, so sorry. I’m so sorry you had to resort to marrying Valentin. I’m so sorry for all of this.”

I sit with her in silence for a little while. She slumps and looks defeated as the stew simmers on the stovetop. I remember smellingkhashlamaas a little girl and feeling so excited for dinner, but now there’s nothing. No joy at the memory, no anticipation of a good meal.

Just a cold bleak acceptance that my life will never be the same, and might never have been what I thought it was.

Chapter 16

Karine

Ithrow my clothes into a hamper and drag it down the hall.

It surprises me how much stuff I have. In my head, the last few years really drained me of everything. I’d been selling anything with value on eBay just to bring in a few extra dollars, but even after getting rid of my laptop, my headphones, the antique dolls my grandmother left to me when I was little, and a dozen other trinkets, I kind of figured I’d be down to basically nothing.

Which is far from true. I’ve got so much stuff, and it’s a huge pain to lug it to the extra bedroom at the far end of the house.

Nikkita stands in the hallway with a pinched frown and her arms crossed over her chest. She says nothing to me as I get myself settled in my new little home. I arrange my clothes in the drawers and even place a few of the personal effects Valentin’s men had brought over from my room.

“He is not going to like this,” she says to me finally, standing in the doorway.

“I’m aware.”

“You should go back.”

“I’m not going to.”

Her disapproval radiates off her like smoke. I meet her glare with one of my own. Let the old bossy Russian lady hate me; I don’t even care anymore. I’m so far out of my depth right now and basically doing anything I can to get some semblance of control back into my life.

If that means throwing a little hissy fit and moving into the room down the hall, then fine.

I know it’s petty, but it’s the best I can do.

“All right, have it your way.” Nikkita turns to leave, but hesitates. “Would you like something? Tea maybe?”

That’s a huge surprise. I’ve been here for three days, and this is the first time she’s offered to do anything for me.

“Tea would be nice, thank you,” I say, dropping my guard a little.

She leaves without a word. I’m alone in my new room, looking around at the small bed and the dressers, and I know what’s going to happen later.

The thing is, we’ve been sharing a bed, and it hasn’t been that bad.

I mean, in some ways, it’s been nice.

I like having him next to me, breathing deeply, a warm and gorgeous presence in the darkness.

And I don’t even mind when he reaches across the bed and drags me over to his side.

To use me as he sees fit.

That’s not so terrible, really.

But the thing is, there are so manyrulesin this house.

Like for starters, I can’t go outside. Not without at least one escort, but preferably two, and the guards take that command very seriously. They won’t even let me look at a door without Valentin’s permission.

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