Page 74 of Lamb

I stared down at Ash’s unmoving form, her chest rising and falling, her face relaxed and tranquil for the first time in days. Mint’s medicine was working its magic, allowing her to rest in a dreamless sleep, not plagued by flashbacks or nightmares.

My gaze slid across the hair amassed on the pillow behind her, wondering how long it would take me this time to detangle it all. I looked forward to it.

Paranoia rippled across my skin; she could just be pretending to be asleep. She could be plotting anything. I had removed any possible weapon from the room while Mint had been tending to Ash, and now a random assortment of items had been piled up in the hallway and, more importantly, out of Ash’s reach.

I wasn’t sure what effect I had left on her, whether it was a strong warning or another trauma to add to the pile. Either way, Ash did not look in my direction a single time during the half hour it had taken for the medication to take effect. As she’d grown drowsy, her eyelids struggling to stay open and her body collapsing into the soft bed, she’d still focused her efforts to not let even a slither of my body perverse her view.

A part of me hoped she’d done so out of fear. Hopefully, it would be enough to deter her from doing anything else stupid. But a larger part of me hoped it wasn’t. Hoped I hadn’t just destroyed the sandcastle of trust I’d been carefully building the last few weeks.

“Wolf needs to know,” Mint cut through my thoughts.

I didn’t move my gaze, watching a stray hair bend and sweep Ash’s face with every soft breath.

“You were dangerous,” Mint continued when I didn’t respond. “You were out of control. You could have killed her.”

“I know my strength,” I argued, but it only fueled Mint’s anger more. I wondered if a part of his frustration was due to my earlier attack where I had bested him. I’d only won due to Mint’s surprise, and his tackle had shallowed with hesitation. He’d been careful about Ash getting caught in the crossfire and had attacked too wide. It was the only reason I’d been able to deflect his blow.

It was also why I knew it had nothing to do with our fight. Mint was loyal, but even more so, responsible. He was serious when it came down to his charges, whether that had been Mallory, Adair, or even Ash.

“I don’t think you can trust yourself,” Mint bit back, his voice calm, but the undertones were hard and angry. “This isn’t like you. You’re not impulsive or so … emotional.”

I glanced at Mint for the first time, his hand waving in the air, signifying his confusion as he struggled for the right word. Mint was on the money, however, much to both his and my surprise. But there was little reason to be as shocked as I was. I had sensed it. Knew something was stirring, and I had chosen to ignore it.

This was the outcome.

“You’re right.” I sighed, my chest and reservation deflating in tandem. “I’m not,” I explained. “But don’t use that as a measure to judge me or my actions. I know what I’m doing. I always do.”

“Sure.” Sarcasm dripped from his words. “I get that you must have some grand plan. Some reason for doing all of this. I’d even bet money on it.” He gave a defeated sigh, reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose as he worked it between his finger and thumb. “But whatever effect this girl is having on you, it’sfucking with your head, man. That, back there, that can’t happen again. Ever.”

I rubbed my palm over my chest, soothing the tight knot having made its home there. It was heavy and throbbed beneath my touch as I moved my gaze back to the girl lying prone in my bed, alive and breathing.

“She won’t be leaving,” I said, my voice clear and calm. “Neither will I.”

A frustrated growl burst over my shoulder and, fortunately, neither of us was worried about Ash waking. She was out cold under the influence, and though I hadn’t been happy about it, it was what she needed.

“Fine,” Mint seethed. “But I’m letting Prez in on this. Our deal to stay quiet ended the second you put your hands around her neck.”

Mint’s thumping march traveled down the hallway, shaking the few decorated paintings on the wall, before he disappeared down the staircase and slammed the front door shut behind him.

I let him go, never having the intention to stop him.

If I had wanted, I would have had no problems convincing Mint to sew his mouth shut, whether by reason or force. But something else held me back this time. Something that Mint had nailed on the head.

I wasn’t acting like myself. Something inside of me had become unraveled … untethered. But that wasn’t even the worst part of it. Despite the reasoning, the logic, and the self-awareness that I had over my situation, I didn’t care.

When it all came down to it, I knew I’d let hell freeze over before I let her leave my sight. I didn’t understand it, but I knew the deep burning would turn to hellfire if she ever tried to leave me. Knew the wrath I would wreck if her pulse ever stopped. The destruction I’d reign down on the earth if her breaths became her last.

Mint was right.

I was dangerous.

Merlot, Cherry, Ruby …

Beautiful shades of red among many I’d seen Wolf’s face change over the years. It was to the point that I had come to expect it whenever the man knocked down my clubroom door, waited for me at the clubhouse gate or, in rare cases, like today, showed up on my doorstep.

This time, however, the huge Russian warhorse wore neither a dusty pink nor a flush of rose. His face was its usual shade, and I found that … unsettling.

I’d heard his bike bellow in the distance shortly after Mint had disappeared outside with his cigarettes and phone. Mint had met him outside, and I had awaited the familiar stomp of his boots.