Page 1 of Tangled up in You

TANGLED IN THEIR EMBRACE

MAUREEN SHIGENO

CHAPTER 1

MELANIE

Driving down a scenic route with snow-covered farm pastures and trees should be therapeutic. It’s not. Heaviness settles in my chest.

I want things to go back to the way they were months ago. When I was blissfully ignorant of the things happening within my home. When I ignored all the red flags that told me things needed to change.

But I can’t, and I have to live with that.

Which is why I’m returning to my hometown with all my shit smashed into my white sedan.

I’m ashamed of how I got here. It feels like all my years of pushing forward were for nothing. No one dreams of moving back in with their parents in their late thirties.

Yet here I am, simply because my ex-husband couldn’t get over his many, many issues. His drug addiction and selfish tendencies were more important than the life we built together. Almost twenty years of marriage out the window.

I can’t say I didn’t see it coming. I fought to keep us together, but you can’t change someone who isn’t willing to change themselves. I did everything I could, but in the end, it wasn’tenough and I had to walk away. There’s only so much trauma and disappointment a person can take.

I turn off the sparse highway and into a residential neighborhood right outside the city limits. While residents call the town small, its population of ten thousand makes it a decent-sized county in Montana. When I was younger, the streets would have been filled with kids on bicycles and golf carts, but today, it’s quiet.

Memories of playing with the neighbor kids fill my mind: climbing trees, playing baseball in the street, imagining we were Power Rangers and fighting evil. It was a simpler time that I now miss.

Three of my playmates are in every memory I conjure: Kent, Simon, and Oliver. My long-lost best friends, my gang. The four of us were inseparable in our younger years. It wasn’t until after high school graduation that our bond broke. We went our own separate ways and eventually lost touch.

I’d give anything to go back to that time when I was naïve and innocent enough to think anything was possible.

Now I know better.

Love isn’t enough to keep people together. It takes a lot more than just that, like trust and growth. Understanding and communication. Eventually, my relationship ran out of all those things and more. When the thought of him not being around was more comforting than having him present, I knew it was time to let go.

I pull into my mother’s driveway and park my car. While a feeling of home washes over me at the familiar surroundings, I’m also hit with a wave of sadness. The only things I have to show for my years away are a broken heart and more clothes and shoes than what I left with.

With a deep sigh, I shut off my engine and step out into the cold. Snow clouds above mimic my internal turmoil, cloudy and depressing.

My gaze travels to the homes nearby. To my left is Kent’s parents’, to the right is Simon’s, and across the street is Oliver’s. As per my mother’s last gossip, Oliver moved back a few years ago, but she hasn’t seen Simon or Kent. They were the adventurous types, so I’m not surprised they never came back.

I’m nervous about seeing Oliver again. While it would be nice to reconnect and get back to a time when my life made sense, I’m embarrassed to tell him why I’ve come home. He’d never judge me, but I’m ashamed of it all the same.

As I walk to the front door, my steps falter when my mother comes out to greet me.

“You’re late,” she accuses in a playful tone. “You said you’d be here around noon. It’s three.”

“There was traffic.” I rush up onto the porch to hug her. “I thought you’d be asleep, so I wasn’t in a hurry.”

My mother works nights at the local hospital as a CNA, so she sleeps during the day. I didn’t want to wake her by showing up too early.

“I can sleep anytime.” She squeezes me tightly. “I’ve missed you.”

“I missed you too.” All my earlier apprehensions disappear with her affection, and I’m feeling much better about my choice of coming home.

“Are you okay?” My mother steps back with a frown.

I shrug. “Yeah. I still have moments when I struggle with it, but it doesn’t last too long anymore. I can get through most of the day without being sad, you know?”

“That I do.” She purses her lips.