Page 66 of Acid

I feel his body shake, and I let out a sob as he says, “I tracked down and killed fifty-two of the people who raped me when I was a child.”

Oh God…that’s why he left me on the counter….

“I love you, Perrie, but when I finally had you, I went from feeling at home to feeling sick because I dirtied you up, put my filth on you, and I couldn’t live with it,” he admits in a whisper. “You deserve so much more than me, but the thought of not having you in my life makes it hard to breathe, and the thought of seeing you move on makes me want to fucking run and never come back.”

My body shakes with my silent sobs at his admittance.

Ollie takes a deep breath against my skin before he croaks, “I’m leaving, Tinker….”

My breath stutters, my stomach sinks as my heart breaks, and I quickly turn in his arms, my hands going to his chiseled jaw as our eyes connect.

More tears fall, and I plead, “Please, don’t leave me….”

He tightens his hold on me, his eyes sad, and he admits, “I have to, sweetheart.”

I shake my head, grip his jaw tighter, and beg, “No, please, Ollie. I can’t live without you. Don’t leave me, please….”

He drops his forehead against mine. “I have to,” he repeats, and I squeeze my eyes tight as I sob. “I love you Perrie, but I have to do this. I need help, Tinker.” He gently kisses me, and I look at him. “I’m going to a facility that may be able to help me. I have nightmares, sweetheart. I wake up in a sweat every night. I have flashbacks, that shit with Andrea made things so much fucking worse.” He cups my cheek. “I want a life with you, Perrie, I always have, but while my past is still in my present, then we can’t have a future.”

Tears trail my cheeks, and I ask, “And if you can’t come to terms with your past?”

He licks his bottom lip before admitting, “Then I won’t be returning to New York.”

I sob, my heart breaking at the thought of not seeing him again, and he quickly presses his lips against mine, and without thinking, only reacting, I open my mouth instantly, allowing access for his tongue. He kisses me long and hard, full of love, and I grip his hair. He moans and moves us so I’m beneath him, and instead of panicking, I wrap my legs around his waist, deepening the kiss.

His taste and touch set my body on fire, burning for more.

Ollie gently slides up my shirt to just above my waist, his fingers going between my legs. He groans when he realizes I don’t have any panties on, and that I am wet, something that rarely ever happens. It’s him; it’s what he always does to me.

He moves, unzipping his pants, and placing his cock head at my entrance. Slowly, he pushes in, and I gasp into his mouth as he stretches me, and instead of panicking, instead of tensing, knowing he hasn’t got a condom on, I moan and tighten my legs around his waist as he bottoms out.

Gently, Ollie runs his fingers up my arms, causing me to let go of his jaw and hair, before linking our fingers beside my head, and making love to me. His thrusts are slow but hard, his hips tilted, ensuring to hit the spot deep inside that makes my stomach tighten, my walls flutter, and I moan.

His grip on my hands tightens as our kiss heats up and his hips thrust harder.

My stomach tightens, and my breathing picks up as he breaks the kiss and places his forehead against mine, our gazes connecting.

“Come for me, Tinker,” he rasps, his breath mingling with mine, and just as I’m about to tell him I can’t, that I never have before, pleasure like no other consumes me, and I gasp as wetness spills between us.

Ollie groans, thrusting one, two, three more times before pushing deep inside me, stilling, and for the first time, panic doesn’t hit; instead, I tighten my legs around him, and press my lips against his as his member pulses inside me, filling me with his cum.

Ollie moans, tangling his tongue with mine, and instead of unlinking our fingers and rolling off me, he moves his hips again, his member still semi-hard, getting ready for rounds two, three, and four….

My Tinker,

I didn’t want to wake you, didn’t want to say goodbye because I knew I’d just say fuck it and stay after last night, but I knew I couldn’t.

I love you, Perrie, but we both know I need to do this. Last night meant everything, sweetheart, and it made me realize that I can’t live without you. I’m going to work hard to get my past out in the open and finally deal with it.

I won’t allow Aiden to take you from me.

I know we're both hurting, but that’s because we’ve both been through so much, and instead of fighting on our own, I want us to fight together to have a future. I want you to wear my cut on your back, and my ring on your finger.

I want it all with you, Tinker. You’re my best friend, my heart.

Write to me. Tell me your feelings, and I’ll tell you about my past so you can understand why I pulled back from you that day in the gym, when I only wanted to hold you close and never let you go.

Don’t let your fear and trauma take away what we have. Fight for me, Perrie because I’m fighting for you.

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