I roll my eyes. "It’s only for a few more weeks, then she’s out. I already told her yesterday after Piper bragged to a dancer that she’ll be staying there while we’re here.”
Mom butts in, “Please tell me that girl will not be staying at your home.”
I frown at her tone, and deny, "No, Mom, she’s not. Management told her to stay at the motel or go home.”
Mom nods with approval, confusing me, as Nick gives me a piece of paper, stating, “It’s already paid for, so don’t even think about it.” Then he shoves me toward the garage, grinning. I look toward Mom as I open the garage door to see she’s basically bouncing with excitement, grinning from ear to ear.
Weird, very fucking weird.
It doesn’t take long before I pull up outside the bakery and tap the steering wheel, wondering if I should call and have them bring the cake out.
Nearly two years and I’m still not used to the fans.
Shaking my head, I grab the paper and mutter, “Just get in and out,” and climb out of my car.
I keep my eyes peeled but head low, hoping no one will notice me, when I hear the bell over the door and look up so I don’t bump into whoever is coming out, but I freeze in shock.
Curves to die for, long curly dark red hair cascading down her back, lips so plump they beg me to bite, and so oblivious to me standing here.
She smiles, saying, “See you soon,” before turning my way and freezing in place herself.
Her dark green eyes widen when they lock with mine, and everything inside me awakens, and everyone around me disappears.
“Rose…” I rasp with pain and love and heartache.
She blinks, then blinks again, like she can’t believe it’s really me, before she shakes herself out of it, flares her nostrils, andwalks toward me. But instead of stopping before me like I thought she would, she passes me, completely ignoring me.
Anger and pain hit me hard, and I have to fist my hands so I don’t turn around and fucking grab her.
I stand here for God knows how long, trying to get my emotions under control after seeing her for the first time in nearly two years, pissed that she’s acting like a scorned lover only for it to hit me?—
She was wearing my black button-down shirt from prom….
nine
Rose
I closemy eyes as a gentle breeze hits me, nothing but the birds chirping and trees rustling hitting my ears.
“It’s peaceful here; I can see why your mom chose this cemetery,” I say, leaning back against the stone and looking up. “I’m sorry I haven’t been to see you. I wanted to be here for the funeral, but I didn’t want to cause a scene. Al made it perfectly clear he’d physically throw me out if I showed. I-I didn’t want that stress on your family, even if it meant I didn’t get to say goodbye, and then as time went on, it became too difficult to come back into town. The longer I stayed away, the easier it was to forget this part of my life, and then Al came home. I knew I wouldn’t be welcome.”
I chuckle and shake my head. “Can you believe it, Cal? My brother, the person I loved the most on this earth growing up, threatened me. He allowed his partner to hit me, and believed I’d cheat on Noah, he said…. He-he said I died when Mom did, and he got married and let me find out through the news. When he realizes I never did what they think I did, he’s going tounderstand why I’ll never want him anywhere near my son, or me for that matter. He’s going to realize that, yes, Ididdie when Mom did, that hedidlose his sister….”
Hurt fills me, the past still clouding my emotions, the pain too much to bear, and I close my eyes. “Deigo will be one in two weeks, Cal, three days before Noah turns twenty-one.” I sigh. “It doesn’t seem real, you know, I mean, right about now I should be married to Noah or at least engaged, watching his dreams come true while learning all about animal behavior, but I’m not. Instead, I’m a single mom, struggling to meet rent each month with the two jobs I have, and trying to keep up with part-time college, going for a degree I never wanted to begin with because I couldn’t get a full scholarship.” Tears sting my eyes. “You should be working with Alejandro, living it up, not buried six feet under. Everything is different than how it should be Cal, and it kills me.”
Some tears fall, and I wipe them away, looking toward the mountains.
“Dad wants to try and make amends, yet he’s the one who kicked me out, who tried to force an abortion on me because of what happened with mom. He’s with Deigo now, and honestly, I don’t know how to feel about it.” I snort. “He begged. He actually hired someone to track me down, and sat at my work every day for three weeks, begging me to give him a chance with his grandson. If it weren’t for Mrs. Cannon convincing me that I can’t punish him for my hurt because I’d be punishing Diego by keeping his grandfather from his life, then I wouldn’t be sitting here now.” I swallow hard. “He’s got these next two weeks to prove to me he won’t treat my son the way he did me. If he shows he’s changed, I’ll allow him to have a relationship with Diego, just not with me.”
The breeze picks up, and I smile sadly. “I know I sound bitter and spiteful, like I’m holding onto a grudge, but I just…I’m atthe stage where I believe I’m better off on my own.” I look down, gently playing with the rose bracelet I have yet to cut off, and admit, “It’s better that way, I think.”
Gently, I trace Noah’s name on my wrist, underneath the bracelet, the date we met just below it. Diego’s name sits above his father’s, then his date of birth.
“I’ll always love him, Cal. It wasn’t puppy love or high school love. It was all-consuming; it was everything. No one held a candle to him, never on my radar. He’s my heart and my soul, but being on my own, after feeling the pain I felt when he left, and having all my family turn against me, being on my own is for the best. I’ll never allow anyone into my heart again. Keeping a roof over Deigo’s head is all I care about now.” More tears fall. “I’ve lost everything and everyone but him, Cal…. You, Dad, Noah, Al, Van, Barnett, Cameron…. Everyone but him.”
Another breeze hits, and I tilt my head into the sun, smiling, hoping that is his way of agreeing with me….
With a heavy heart, knowing I wouldn’t be back at his grave for a long while, I promise Cal I’ll do my best to visit him, before leaving for town and heading to the bakery for Diego’s birthday cake, even though it is two weeks away.