Page 67 of The Dating Contract

Both Shayna and Naomi snickered in a way that made Leah uncomfortable.

“Right. So you did your research—read books and watched movies and TV shows about fake dating, and you decided that you’d outsmart the trope and be the exception,” Shayna said. “Except here you are, asking your cousin and your sister-in-law if they can recognize real love.”

“While you’re trying on a bridesmaids dress, no less,” Naomi said.

Adding insult to injury, was the fact that Leah had decided she was not going to poke at Naomi about Jason. Nope. She was going to be good. For good or evil, she’d brought this subject up in the first place, and she was going to be stuck with it. “Fine, fine,” she said. “Poof might mean acknowledging real feelings, not just them existing.”

“Because,” Naomi added, “look at it this way. Feelings, emotions, love, are the complete opposite of rational. They show up when you least expect them or want them to. They’re a mess.”

Which made Leah sigh. “Fine,” she said. “So I may have caught real feelings, and am in the process of having mypoofmoment.”

“Which,” Shayna said, “makes me think that all along, the real question you’re asking is how you make this fake situation real. And that’s with trust. You need to trust himandtell him how you’re feeling.”

“So,” Naomi added, “what are you going to do about the fake fail moment you’re having? Are you going to tell Samuel you want something real or…?”

“I’m supposed to see him in a few days,” Leah said, addressing both her interrogators at once as she figured out how to answer their questions. “We’re going to a birthday party.”

Naomi said, “Which doesn’t answer the question your sister-in-law, or I asked. And maybe that’s something you need to think about?”

Leah sighed. Honesty was probably the best tactic she had at the moment, and though she didn’t really want to admit her feelings, she was going to have to if she was hoping to survive this. “I don’t know,” she admitted, being as careful as she could. “I don’t know if I want to actually do anything about the feelings. I almost lost my mind when I texted him about going with him to the MMJH. We’re not a good idea and yet I can’t handle this…”

“Can you please listen to yourself?” Liv asked. “You have these ideas about him because of who you were and who he was back in high school. Both of you have changed since then. Both of you are different people.”

She found herself remembering the conversation she’d witnessed him having with Josephine Bruck. Maybe he had changed, found his voice enough to use it on behalf of people he cared about?

“Maybe?”

Shayna shook her head; apparently her sister-in-law had morphed into some wizened expert. “You’re way past maybe. Heck; you’re already talking about including him in things.”

Which was true. She’d never send a text like that if she wasn’t in some way ready to talk about the past, her feelings and making her fake relationship real. Even with all of its…foibles and treachery.

And that led her to one inexorable conclusion. “You’re right,” she told her sister-in-law.

“Excellent.” And after Naomi left to head back to Manhattan, Shayna grinned at her. “I will,” Shayna said, “at some point expect to see him at Shabbas dinner or dessert or something later. Because I can’t keep you insulated from the family gossip forever.”

“It’s something we planned for,” Leah said. “But I promise you’ll be the first to know when I schedule it.”

“When,” Shayna said, grinning. “I like the sound of those words. And that would make sense, considering we’re hosting your family Shabbat.”

As she headed back to Manhattan, Leah started to think about Samuel and about their situation. Did she have the words to actually talk about what had happened all those years ago? Was she actually capable of seeing the incident through the eyes of adults looking at something under hermetically sealed glass?

She wasn’t sure yet, but one thing she did know, was that she was going to see if she had the right words to initiate the conversation about the past so they could move forward. Because even if she wasn’t yet ready, she needed to be ready soon.

Her heart, and what it wanted, depended on it.

Chapter Twenty

Samuel needed tocalm down.

He needed to breathe, not sweat through his palms all over his jeans. And he wasn’t sure what was going to happen.

His apartment was clean, he was ready to go and he had the birthday present ready and waiting.

He couldn’t concentrate on the list of work he had to do. So he checked something off the list that was pending; sent the email to the congregation in Virginia, declining the opportunity to write the Sefer Torah due to other pending commitments, but that he’d love to be considered for future work.

And if that closed a door for him, he was okay with it.

Because he was happy with what he did—mezuzahs, megillahs, ketubahs and the occasional poster and the possibility of working with other creatives even if Liam’s offer didn’t officially come in.

---