Page 52 of Gilded Saint

“Do you regret it?”

His expression becomes unreadable. I squirm, uncomfortable in the silence and in his change. He ruffs up his hair with one hand, scratching as if he’s got the worst itch, and then he morphs back into the easygoing guy. “No regrets,” he says with an odd smile. “It’s best to look ahead and prepare.”

“And that’s what you do?”

His lower lip protrudes and his shoulder lifts in gentle, modest agreement.

“I’ll try that. If I’m looking forward and preparing, I need to do so with eyes wide open. I hate feeling like I’ve been naive or…foolish.” I bite out the distasteful word.

He brushes his thumb over my cheek thoughtfully.

“You know,” his hand snakes beneath the covers, landing on my hip, and he tugs, shifting me closer, “it occurs to me we’re doing a lot of things backward.”

“What do you mean?” Since I’m closer, I let my hand flatten against his chest. His heartbeat pulses beneath my palm.

“Getting to know each other after we’ve…entered an arrangement. After we’ve…”

“Made love,” I supply.

His eyes narrow. “Had sex. Willow, this is still temporary. It will end. One day.”

I blink in acknowledgment. “But we don’t know when. It can’t be too soon or?—”

“It won’t be too soon. I promise you; I won’t leave until it’s been long enough that your independence is assured.”

“I appreciate that.”

“Is that why you approached me, Willow? Did you think if you didn’t give me this, that I would…” He doesn’t complete the sentence, and his distressed expression tells me everything.

“I wanted this,” I assure him. “I always thought you were handsome. Is it so wrong if a woman wants sex?”

“No.” He pulls back the comforter, exposing me to below my hips. His fingers trace along my clavicle, down my chest, to the valley between my breasts. He cups one breast gently, as if weighing it.

He is my husband, but I sense it’s best not to remind him of that. What I can do is play to his requirements. “As long as it’s only with you?”

His gaze lifts from my breast. His eyes lock on mine, and my heart pitter-patters out of synch. “As long as we’re in this arrangement, only with me.”

He lowers his head and takes a nipple into his mouth. Wet heat and suction elicit a moan, and I swear I feel his mouth deep inside me. My back curls forward. He releases the nipple and seeks the other one. My fingers toy with his hair, and his hand slides between my legs. I spread my thighs, opening for him.

His finger dips inside and a deep growl vibrates from his mouth, still latched onto my nipple. He pushes up and hovers over me.

“Flat on your back, princess.” I roll onto my back, compliant. “Since we’re in agreement,” a smile plays across his lips, “let’s do this the right way this time.”

His warm body covers mine, and I hold him, caressing his back as he lowers his mouth and claims my lips. This time when we kiss, it’s slow and languid. Playful and exploratory. My inner thighs brush against his outer thighs, over his coarse hair, as my fingers roam his spine and shoulders, kneading the flexed muscles.

“You have the most beautiful eyes. I’m not the first to tell you that, am I?”

His lips fall to my neck, and I stretch, giving him all the access he desires. He nibbles and sucks until he arrives at my breasts.

“I’m going to show you things I know that college boy didn’t.”

He continues pressing kisses down my stomach until he hovers over me, down there. He spreads my legs wide, and I close my eyes, fingers teasing his thick hair, lost to his touch and his skill.

He studies my body with a devotion I’ve never felt before. He’s an astute student, studying my every reaction, learning my loves. Or perhaps worship is a better word choice than learn. My last thought as I fall asleep nestled against him is a reprimand.

Don’t be naive. This isn’t forever.

Chapter18

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