Page 9 of All Our Secrets

“Apparently, I have help now.” Peyton glared daggers at me as she said it before beaming at the boy. “Thank you, Josh.”

The boy reddened in the face. “Anytime, Mrs. Johnson.”

As Josh ran back in, I asked. “Is he one of your students?”

“Used to be. He graduated last year.”

“You shouldn’t smile at those poor boys so easily.”

“Oh my God.” Her eyes circled around her sockets again.

“How did your brain look today?”

Her nose crinkled. “What?”

“I assume with how much eye-rolling you do, you see your brain at least once a day.”

Peyton pressed her lips together. “You know, Silas, you’realmostfunny, but I happen to know you and just can’t vibe with your personality.”

“Vibe?” I asked, then stopped at her Tahoe. “Unlock the door.”

“It’s what the kids are saying,” she replied, unlocking her vehicle.

“Justno.” I shook my head and raised the trunk door.

“See? Lame. Ain’t nobody can vibe with you.”

Immense pleasure bounced around in my chest as I put her groceries in the back. Sometimes, because life was cruel like that, I forgot everything else and simply enjoyed Peyton’s presence. She tried to befriend everyone, even me, and never had a problem speaking her mind and cracking jokes. I lived for her silly words. And that would always be my conundrum. I spent so much time ignoring and tryingnotto get close that the proximitynowwas lethal to my system. It took several months for her to even carry on a conversation with me after Theodore passed. All my avoidance hadn’t escaped her notice over the years.

And because I wasn’t supposed to relishanymoment with her, I closed the trunk and turned. When I spotted the diamond on her ring finger, a haunting image of the fury in Theodore’s eyes during our last conversation flashed inside my head. My heart crashed to the ground, and I swallowed the bile threatening to come up. Her presence was a blessing and a curse.

I exhaled. “Call one of us when you need help.”Call me.“Don’t be stubborn.”

“If I need help, I will.”

“Do I need to follow you home, or will you ask Rosie to help you unload the groceries?” Theodore’s parents lived right next door to Peyton.

“You know Theodore’s dad will be out there as soon as I pull into the driveway.”

“Fair enough.”

Peyton pursed her lips at me before huffing. “You’re a good friend but stop it already. Theodore wouldn’t have wanted you at my beck and call all the time.” I froze, ice encasing my heart as she continued, “I don’t understand you, Silas. You spent so much time not speaking to me that it pisses me off every time you appear somewhere, acting like you care. You should have tried to befriend me when it mattered. What good does it do now when you don’t even have to put up with me anymore because he’s… gone?”

And with that, she got in her Tahoe and left.

I hadn’t been a good friend to Peyton. Or to him. Now, I came to her every chance I got as an excuse to see her. Otherwise, what reason would I have for seeing my best friend’s widow? If Theodore really thought I could cut her out of my heart, then…

Fucking impossible.

I tried that for years and ended up here.

Something’s wrong with my brain.Was that why soulmates didn’t exist? To care so deeply was to spend a lifetime yearning. In my case, alone.

Chapter Four:

knock, knock

Peyton

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