Page 75 of All Our Secrets

“Don’t make me laugh.” I ran my fingers through my hair and blew out a breath. Was it hot in here? “Maybe you should have roomed with someone else if you’re going to complain. I’m sorry I have so much energy sometimes.”

“You said you were tired.”

“I am.”

He quirked a brow.

I huffed. “Don’t make me drop kick you. I’m telling you; it won’t be pretty.”

He chuckled. “We both know you’re all bark, no bite.”

I opened my mouth, then snapped it shut. Some things were better to wait on. I’d let him win this verbal sparring because I needed him to screw the stupid out of my system.

“Goodnight, asshole,” I grumbled as I disappeared to my room, where I tossed and turned and tossed and turned, huffing and hating myself for being a coward. T.J. woke up for a good hour, and it probably had something to do with me smacking my pillow and blowing my frustrations into it. After a bottle, diaper change, and a good long staring contest with mommy, he fell asleep again.

Me, on the other hand, I was exhausted but still a growing mess of disappointment and need.

“Just do it,” I whispered to myself. Do it!Do it.

Go into his room and ride him like your sanity depends on it.

Because it did.

In nothing more than an oversized T-shirt, I climbed out of bed, tiptoed to the door, opened it, and held my breath. The refrigerator rumbled as its motor kicked on, and I jumped a mile, clutching my chest.What am I doing? I eyed the darkness ahead of me, then the darkness I’d come from. One led to tossing and turning until sleep put me out of my misery. The other: rejection orrelief.

I tiptoed ahead, leaving the bedroom door open so I’d hear T.J. if he woke. Silas’s bedroom was straight across from mine, but the area was unfamiliar and pitch black. I had to carefully maneuver myself through the living room. His door was open—did he not care about privacy? Sheesh. A woman could sneak right in and climb on top of him.

Sliding my hand across the wall and doorway, I sucked in ragged, choppy breaths as my nerves climbed in my throat.Argh! Again, I had that single thought racing through my head.What am I doing? I couldn’t see the bed, or him, for that matter. I should have turned back, but then I caught a whiff of his body wash. Or maybe his deodorant.

Mm.

I carried on, hands straight out in front of me, slow and steady. By the time my fingers ran across his blanket, I was panting.

Oh God. I’d really snuck into his room.

My palm slid up, bumping a foot or leg. I jerked it away so quickly I couldn’t be sure. I took a few seconds to calm my breathing before I continued. The bed dipped slightly when I placed my knees at the bottom, but there was no creak. I found his feet and grinned like the psycho I was in the dark. It felt like he was lying on his back. I straddled his legs, climbing over him until my hips aligned with his. I gasped, and some of the tension diminished. Silas was hard. Not just hard, he feltlarge.I pressed my pulsing clit down on his length straining through his boxers. His dick jolted, and my toes curled.He’s awake.He knew. And that feltnothinglike rejection.

My hands went to his chest. Sparse hair tickled my palm as my fingers roamed. Silas wasn’t rippling with a six-pack. No, his hard body came from years of hard labor: lifting and hauling lumber and doing manual work most men paid someone else to do. I shivered and rocked against him once.

A large palm shot out and grabbed one of my hips. The other traitorous one turned on the shade lamp on the nightstand. My hair was probably a rat’s nest tumbling down my shoulders, but my heart still skipped a beat when our eyes met and his gaze landed on my thighs.

Leaning forward, I swiftly turned the light back off. I liked the dark. I liked him quiet. It was safer than looking straight into his almost coal-black eyes as I gave my body to him. Because I was going to, and I already knew he was going to take it.

“Peyton—”

I slapped my hand across his lips to silence him. “Shh,” I murmured, then rocked against him once. I wanted this to mean nothing. I wanted to pretend Silas was anyone else. Even though I knew it was him. Wanted him beneath me, despite the effort I’d made to quiet that desire.

He yanked my wrist away before his hand at my hip slipped under my shirt and palmed an ass cheek. “No panties?” he asked.

My body came to life at his words. His voice sent shivers down my spine and need coursing to my core. Of course he wouldn’t be quiet. I shuddered as his fingers moved between my butt cheeks, grazing over the forbidden hole before finding the needy spot that craved him. I raised my hips slightly so I could reach between us. My inner walls tightened as he pinched my clit enough to send a bolt of lightning through me.

“Ah!”That’s new.

Suddenly, I was terrified of what I was doing. I was on top, but he was in control.

Slipping my hands inside his boxers, I gripped his hot, hard flesh, eliciting a hiss from Silas. By the time I got his dick out of his boxers, I was panting, acting blinding on my passions, while he flicked my clit.

I hadn’t come to him for foreplay. Or slow and sensual. By the quake of his arms, I didn’t think he’d offer those things anyway. His breathing was just as labored as mine, as if we had already run miles the second we finally allowed ourselves the first touch. As if we’d been waiting far too long.

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