Page 74 of Just Enough

I turned around. “This long?”

He unbuttoned the top of his shirt, and I swallowed. He opened the pack of beer and handed me one. “I kept them cold in the fridge at work.”

I took it. “You could have picked something tastier.”

He smirked, opened his, and went to the couch and sat down. I joined him there and opened mine. I took a drink and fought the need to make a face. Yeah, I would have preferred something other than a beer to get drunk for my first time. I tucked my legs underneath me as I faced him. The living room was dimly lit. I only had the floor lamp on while I had been sitting around, debating calling him and waiting for him to get home.

“So… Why drink with me now?”

His eyes were on me, completely fixated. It had me shaky and thrilled. “Did you ever sleep with any of them without a condom?”

I hadn’t expected that from him. “No. I always used condoms… Why? Did you not use them?” Please say you did.

“No. I always did too.” I looked away because he was making me nervous. “You’re still on birth control, aren’t you?” His questions really were giving the living room a certain amount of intensity that had me squirming and squeezing my legs together.

“Yeah, I am.” I raised up and sat my beer on the table. “Why the questions?” Even my voice had a tremor in it.

He leaned up and set his beer down, then he scooted closer to me. “Did you read the scene I wrote yet?”

I blushed. He was killing me. I had to look away again. “Yeah, but why are you bringing that up now?”

“Because we haven’t really been friendly the last month for me to get a chance to.”

This was my doing. I did this earlier when I had cried and now he knew everything, and now I saw something in his own eyes staring back at me.

“No, we haven’t,” I whispered.

“Am I still your Benjamin?” His deep, velvety voice asked me.

I thought about it. This was Benjamin next to me. This was the eyes, the arms that hugged and consoled me countless times, but he wasn’t safe. At least not to my emotions. I didn’t recognize my body around him. I was completely out of control when he was around… But this was my Benjamin. He might have set me anew, and I might not ever get a grip on what I felt when he was around anymore, but he’d never hurt me.

He was safe in the most unsafe way.

“You’re still my Benjamin,” I mumbled.

Our eyes held something, then he let go to place a kiss on my forehead. I closed my eyes and absorbed it before grabbing his face when he leaned away and returned one to his forehead. He slid his hand into my hair and kissed one of my eyes. I did the same all the while we kept looking at each other. Next, he kissed my cheek. I returned it. When he claimed my lips, I claimed his back. I moaned. He never stopped.

His hand left my hair, and he placed both at my waist as he pulled me atop of him. I straddled him as he leaned back and continued to devour my lips. I burned all over. I’d never been so aware of my body as I did now and how much it could feel.

I opened my mouth for his tongue to come in and he groaned. His hands were on my legs, then they were sliding up toward my ass where he slipped his hands underneath my shorts and squeezed both cheeks tightly. I separated our lips and gasped as he pressed me into his erection between us.

“You’re trembling.” His voice was thick and gravelly as he spoke. “Do you like that?” He pressed me into him again.

My face was on fire. I hadn’t realized he’d be verbal during moments like this… I normally wasn’t, so I had no idea what to say or how to handle how sensitive my body was becoming in his arms. Even my breasts were heavy and achy—that couldn’t be normal.

“You’re quiet, that’s okay. I’ll make you let go.”

The bottom of my stomach reacted to his words.

He grabbed the bottom of my shirt and forced me to lift my arms up. Then he was unhooking my bra. He grabbed two big handfuls as he groaned. “Fuck.”

“Your shirt,” I mumbled, reaching for his.

“Want it off?” he asked me. I nodded, and he yanked it off immediately. “I need more skin.” He was lifting me up, sliding my shorts down with haste. He tugged my panties down with them. There was an awkward moment of me getting completely out of them then it was over, and his eyes didn’t know which part of me to stare at because they couldn’t stay put as he unzipped his own pants.

I watched with nervous excitement as he did so, but he did nothing more than slide his pants down just enough. I could see the outline of his erection against his black briefs.

He grabbed ahold of the back of my head and pulled me into another breathtaking kiss. I squirmed against him, and when he slid his free hand between us and slid a finger between my folds, I squeezed his shoulders and shoved my tongue so far back into his mouth, he groaned.

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