Page 31 of Holly, Jolly, and Oh So Naughty

I spend the next forty minutes applying moisturizers and lotions, then drying my hair on the lowest setting so as not to disturb anyone else in the house. All the while, my thoughts dance back and forth between the appropriate way to text James back.

Should I just say goodnight? Should I thank him too? Do I put a kiss? Will it be weird if I don’t put a kiss? Maybe his kiss was an accident, and he’d hit send before he realized, and then my kiss would be the awkward one. Or if I ignore it, maybe that will be more awkward and will prompt him to bring it up in person?

I feel like a teenager again, trying to navigate a complicated dating scene when it really should be anything but complicated. If he were any other man, I wouldn’t be struggling like this. I would follow up on that kiss with purpose, and I would definitely text him back.

My bed is a welcome comfort after spending hours on my feet, but I’m no closer to a decision about James.

If he were here right now, things would be simpler. I could talk to him, and we could work out what that kiss meant together.

Maybe it meant nothing.

Or it meant everything.

I stare at the ceiling, still feeling the phantom sensation of his mouth against mine. The shower didn’t help, especially since all thoughts of him in there with me, helping me wash, got me more hot and bothered.

Even now, with cool sheets pressing against my warm skin and the allure of sleep on the edge of my mind, I’m still bothered.

Shifting around under the covers, my thighs press together, and a pleasant ache curls through my core. Pushing my face into my pillow, I shove the sensation away and close my eyes.

I need to stop thinking about this and go to sleep.

But fate has different ideas.

Each time I try to force myself to sleep, it lasts only two minutes before my thoughts are back on James. His pretty eyes, his cheeky smile, the softness of his lips, and the way he held me close like I was something so precious.

He tasted the same—a little sweeter, thanks to the flow of alcohol—but he tasted exactly as I remembered.

What if I’d caved into that nostalgic feeling and brought him home?

No, Lily. Stop.

Another restless shuffle around the bed and I try to realign my thoughts with sleep. It works for five minutes.

Then I lose track, and suddenly, James is in my house, pushing me up against the wall and kissing me with purpose. His hands cradle my ribcage, keeping me pinned while our mouths dance together and he steals all the breath from my lungs.

I can still feel the strands of his hair between my fingertips, and I can recall the exact throaty moan he makes when his hair is pulled. I bet it sounds even better now.

Fuck! No!

Frustration builds and my next restless shuffle kicks the covers around and rearranges both of my pillows before I settle. Only this time, I’m tired enough that James eases into my thoughts within a few seconds and I don’t have the energy to force him away.

If he were here right now, right this second, I know what would help me sleep. The warmth of his torso against mine, the sound of his whispers in my ear and the stretch of his cock inside me would solve all my problems.

If he fucked me senseless, I would wake with such clarity that I would know exactly what to do next.

Somehow, my hand ends up in my bedside drawer and I locate my latest toy, aWomanizer. It’s powerful, with vibrations and a delicious gentle suction that mimics the suction of a human mouth. It’s not the same as a real mouth, but in a pinch, it’s amazing.

Maybe that’s how James can make up for all the pain he’s caused. He can spend the rest of his life buried between my legs, making me see stars with that talented tongue of his.

I dip my hand between my thighs and slide my fingers through the slick that’s gathered during my wild, sensual thoughts of James. I tease gently over my sensitive clit, and a punch of pleasure darts through me, making my core clench and my body curl.

Turning on the toy, I roll onto my stomach and press the device against my clit with a soft moan. In my mind, it’s James.

He grips my thighs and holds tightly, keeping me pressed down against the bed and unable to move while he gives me all the attention I deserve. He kisses my pussy, then uses two fingers to gently ease apart my outer lips. When his tongue presses against my inner heat, I lurch and whimper loudly into the cotton fabric of my pillow.

He praises me, tells me I taste divine, and then thrusts his tongue deep inside me with a groan. I rock down against the toy, imagining his tongue fucking into me and licking at my most intimate part. Turning the toy’s power up a notch, James is now paying attention to my clit. The vibrations are his tongue darting back and forth, around and around, then dancing shapes and patterns that I can’t follow.

Each touch feels like the first, and my core throbs in time to my racing heart. Sweat prickles across my skin like little needles, and I have to kick the covers off to stop myself from overheating. Not that it helps. The closer I get to orgasm, the hotter I burn. James tightens his grip on my thighs in my fantasy, forcing me to remain still under his talented mouth and fingers.

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