“I’ve never seen eyes like yours. They’re beautiful.”
I winced, just slightly, thinking about the prophecy the High Queen had told my parents before my birth. The reason I had been so carefully sequestered since that moment—the northern princess no one was allowed to visit, awaiting her secret crown like some silent specter to her own future empire.
Adrian’s brow furrowed at whatever he saw on my face. Like he could sense my displeasure across the bond I still hadn’t accepted.
Except now…maybe I wanted to. Maybe I didn’t want to live that lonely existence anymore. And maybe, despite my formermisgivings about trusting some foreign prince with everything to gain…maybe he was actually as lonely as I was, with nothing up his sleeve but his love for me.
His heart beat steadily beneath the hand I braced on his chest, its rhythm soothing my racing heart.
Adrian raised an eyebrow. “So?”
I blinked. “So…”
“Have I convinced you? Or am I to spend the rest of my days trying?” He leaned forward, his mouth brushing against the exposed skin between my neck and shoulder. “Because I could spend the rest of my life happily doing so if it means getting to hold you like this.”
I sucked in a shaky breath. “You have been…convincing. More than I imagined you could be in so short a time. But if we are indeed doing this, there are a few things you might need to know.”
Adrian had the nerve to smile at me, that godsdamned dimple peeking through to taunt me too. “Indeed.”
I bit my lip, letting it slide out from between my teeth. “That is to say…something important that I’ve been keeping from you.”
“I gathered,” Adrian deadpanned, with an utterly annoying lack of concern. That dimple deepened.
“It’s not something…bad, per se. It’s simply that I’m…well…”
“You don’t have to tell me. I’m not expecting you to open up all at once?—”
“I want to,” I snapped and was surprised to realize it was true.
We stared at each other for a too long moment; everything I wanted to say on the tip of my tongue. But this was myanima, and as much as I tried to tell myself that he was a virtual stranger, that telling him would change things, that I couldn’t trust anyone besides my family with the secret I had kept since my birth…wasn’t that what he was about to become?
“It’s fascinating seeing you at a loss for words for once.” Adrian pressed his lips together like he was holding back a laugh. “I must admit, it’s quite endearing. You realize there’s nothing you could say that could make me not want you?”
“I’m going to be High Queen.”
There was a beat of distended silence, then Adrian let out a relieved breath. “Here I thought you were going to tell me you were cursed or dying. If you want to go through the Choosing one day, I have absolutely no objection.” He frowned. “Did you think I would stop you?”
I sighed, shaking my head. “It’s not really a choice. The Choosing…it’s predetermined, its outcome inevitable. Or at least it is when there’s a seer involved. Queen Amerie herself foresaw that the golden crown in my eyes would be worn by her true successor.”
Adrian blinked slowly, then his brow furrowed. “That’s why your father was so concerned about another heir. Because he knew you would one day leave your station to rule the realm, leaving Soleara to whoever’s magic was strongest, and not necessarily someone of his bloodline.” He swallowed hard. “And that whoever ruled by your side would be…”
“Yes,” I whispered. “Though based on the myriad of insipid suitors he’s flung at me over the years, he was hoping for someone he could easily control. And through them, me.”
His jaw flexed, anger darkening his face. But his voice was gentle when he asked, “Do youwantto be High Queen?”
I looked at him askance. My mouth opened then closed again before I managed to respond. “No one’s ever asked me that.”
He frowned. “We’ll get back to that. Why were you so afraid to tell me?”
“I’ve always been told that if I were to tell someone, they would use that information to their advantage,” I explained as his fingers stroked up and down my back. “Touseme. Iwas already set apart as the only heir to Soleara, my friends handpicked, my movements guarded.Everythingin my life has been chosen for me, down to who I would one day be.”
“I’m sorry,” Adrian said softly.
I shook my head. “You don’t have anything to be sorry for.”
“Not sorry for. Sorry that. I’m sorrythatanyone ever made you believe that you were only worth the crown on your head. That this honor has been anything but that for you.”
I swallowed against the lump in my throat, adding wryly, “In that case, I have a lot of sorry that’s, and extraordinarily few sorry for’s. But thank you all the same.”