Page 258 of Dark Love

“Nice place.”

“Don’t say I don’t take you to all the best locals.” Even with the rancid smells, I’d take this place over the last one any day of the week.

We tread lightly across the floor until we find the stairs to the basement. Fred’s back is to us as he’s watching a soap opera and sipping on a two-liter soda.

The television becomes static as we get closer.

“What is wrong with this stupid television?” Fred turns it on and off several times. “The cable is out again.” He reaches for his computer. “Time to make a phone call.”

“I think Fred has made enough phone calls.” Payne steps in between the couch and the television. “Don’t you?”

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE?” Fred’s screech wobbles. “You better leave before I call my mom.”

“Should you tell him, or should I?” Payne pulls out a knife and taps it on his hand.

“You go ahead. Fred and I are going to communicate shortly.”

Payne nods with an evil grin on his face. “Your mother is gone.”

“Did you kill her? My mom isn’t a nice woman, but still, you shouldn’t have killed her.”

“Your mother is on her way to the Caribbean. She won a month-long vacation. Hopefully, your bruises are healed by then. We wouldn’t want to upset her.”

“Bruises. What bruises? My mom never wins anything.” Fred twists his head to try to look at me but is too lazy to actually move enough to do that.

It’s time to meet my new friend and teach him some manners. I walk around the couch. “Hello, Fred. I heard you like to make phone calls and harass people who are trying to help others. That doesn’t seem very nice to me. Does it seem polite to you?” I ask Payne.

“Making phone calls doesn’t hurt anyone. It isn’t against the law.” Fred starts to shake.

“Didn’t your mother teach you any manners? It’s rude to harass people. And detrimental to your health to harass mine.” I can’t believe I’m not going to kill this guy after the day I’ve had.

“Look man, they’re only women. It’s harmless fun. They’re stuck up—”

And I’m out of patience. “It seems you have a hard time understanding words. I think it’s time for me to teach you manners in a way you’ll understand.” My knuckles crack as I ball my hands into fists.

***

“That should have gotten a bit of your frustration out.” Payne pulls off his gloves as we step out of Fred’s house.

It should have. “That was decidedly unsatisfying. He’s a weasel.”

“A weasel without television, phone, or internet for the next year or two. Do you think he’ll get a job?”

“Doubtful.” But what I don’t doubt is that he’ll think twice about making any more prank phone calls. I’m done wasting time on the weasel. “Do you think the girls will be mad at us?”

“Imogene will probably be irritated that she couldn’t come along.”

That woman has spunk. “What are you going to do when she’s healthy enough to do just that?”

Payne shrugs.

“When she asks for throw pillows, you need to be afraid.” I can’t help the smile that spreads across my face.

“Oh, you two are getting serious. How does it feel?” Payne stops in front of the car.

It should be scary. “Wonderful. If you love her, just say yes to the pillows.”

Friend For Tea

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