Page 24 of Love in the Outfield

“Why?”

“Because.”

His eyes narrow. “Good answer. And you’re how old?”

“Old enough to know better is how old I am. Besides it’s the best I can come up with right at this moment. My brain is addled.” He laughs. All teeth and crinkly eyes.

“There you go again being adorable,” he says.

I lie back down with a heavy sigh and face him. For the life of me, I can’t make myself put space between the two of us.

“When are you gonna tell your folks?” I ask picking at the lint on the blanket.

“I wanted to wait until after I met August. I’d like to tell them tonight before I leave town if that’s alright with you.”

I blow out a breath. “I reckon.”

“Remember, you call the shots.”

“Everything is about to change in a big way. I’m nervous is all.”

“We’ve got this. I have your back, Georgia. You have nothing to worry about.”

“So you say.” I look at him, suddenly sad and blurt, “Was it that easy to leave me?”

His eyes darken as he stares at me with an intensity that sears me to my core. It’s almost like he can see clear into my soul. “It was the hardest damn thing I’ve ever done and my biggest regret.”

“I guess I’ll have to take your word for it. I’ve tried to put myself in your shoes and never can come up with a scenario where I’d take off without at least sayin’ goodbye. What we had was so special. Now don’t get me wrong, I knew we were on borrowed time but to leave without telling me…” I shake my head, “I didn’t think you were capable of that level of cruelty.”

His voice sounds husky. “I know it seems indefensible now, but at the time, I thought it was the right thing to do. I didn’t think I could handle saying goodbye.”

I brush my fingers across his cheek. “You know I’m not mad at you anymore. It must have knocked you off your ever-lovin’ feet to get the call you’d worked for your whole life. But I learned something about myself. I never want to be second best. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t care one little bit about being in the spotlight or letting others shine… it’s just… I need to know at the end of the day that’s all just the trappings and when the dust settles, I’m the gravy on the biscuit.”

“But you are… you were… all that’s true. I messed up big time. I made a terrible mistake. I was young and dumb. I thoughtI’d come back for you and if I was lucky, you’d still want me. I didn’t think I could have both at the time.”

“And you made my point. If you couldn’t have both, you chose baseball. I don’t blame you. Out of all the young boys growing up with dreams of being an MLB player, maybe only a thousand at any given moment make it. That’s a drop in the bucket. You were destined for great things, Cade.”

“I’m older now. I know I can have both. I want to be a big part of your lives.”

“And you will be. I’m not going to stop you from a relationship with your son. He needs you too.”

“What about us?”

“There is no us. We’re co-parenting is all.”

He flops onto his back, jaw tight. I can see the muscles working as he grits his teeth.

“The thing is, the way you keep looking at me says something different.”

“Just never you mind the way you think I’m looking at you. Last I checked, I am still a woman. But besides that, I think you’re seeing what you’re wantin’ to see.”

He snorts. “I don’t think so. It was almost embarrassing the way you were undressing me with your eyes.” His twinkling eyes tell me his humor has returned and he’s having way too much fun at my expense.

I huff. “There’s no denying that you’re a sight for sore eyes but let me make it clear, as temptin’ as you are to look at, you’re definitely off the menu for me. Too many sweets are bad for a person. I’m sorry if you thought I was giving mixed signals.”

He rolls his eyes. “Are you being serious right now? There was nothing mixed about it. You couldn’t tear your gaze away when you thought I was still sleeping.”

My cheeks are on fire. “Take it back,” I exclaim. “Admiring you… maybe, I’ll give you that.”

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