Page 50 of A Tinsel Tale

“That’s what everyone does, isn’t it?” I ask genuinely shocked.

“No. Most people put their socks on both feet then their shoes.”

“No way.”

“Yes way.”

“Has there been a study?” I ask.

“By me. Because of you.”

I snort. “Show me the data.”

She turns, flashing a full-on smile, then taps her temple. “It’s all in the vault.” She nudges her reins and takes a small path to the right heading towards the lake. The land slopes down and erosion has made the footing trickier, so I let Randy have his head. I’m enjoying the view, Evie’s backside and long legs, glimpses of her profile, her long hair loose cascading down her back and her amazing confidence as a rider. She looks like she was born on a horse. Takes me back to when I used to watch her compete in the 4-H county fair. She took home plenty of ribbons too. She’s always excelled at everything.

We reach the shoreline and stop. I watch as the wind catches her hair and she tucks it behind her ears staring out across the vast body of water.

“This view never gets old,” I say.

She doesn’t respond right away. I get a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I can almost feel her retreating and want to scream, ‘Don’t go!’Instead, I say, “What’s wrong?”

She continues to stare out at the choppy water. “I don’t know exactly. Maybe everything. Afraid of falling. Afraid of losing… you… myself… I don’t know.”

“I promise not to hurt you.”

“That’s the thing, Jamie. You can’t promise that. There are no guarantees.”

“You know what I mean. I mean I will never be the one to leave. I fucked up once and lost the love of my life. It won’t happen again.”

“I know you believe that. Let me ask you this. What if something happens to you again? You get hurt, disabled somehow? Do you love me enough to stay this time? Or will you decide for both of us that you know what’s best… for my own good?”

That shuts me up. A few weeks ago, I was thinking that I wasn’t good enough for her and that it was selfish to pursue her.

“Did I hit a nerve?” she asks gently. “See, life is complicated. I know you’d take care of me Jamie, no matter what. But would you let me take care of you?”

“Of course.”Liar. A small group of ducks cruising by grab my attention. “I mean, I think so.”

“See. It’s not so black and white. What areyouafraid of?” she says, turning my question back on me.

“Honestly? That you just want me for my body,” I joke. That goes over like a lead balloon. She literally snarls. I hold up my hands. “Okay. Truth? I have no clue why you’re even interested in me. I’m not good enough. You’re smarter, more successful. You could have anyone you want and I’m just some small-town schmuck that’s nuts to think I could ever have you again.”

Her eyes look sad. “Oh Jamie,” she says. “You are the best man I know… right up there with my dad, and that’s a tall order.”

“Thanks for saying that,” I say gruffly.

“It’s true. Besides being flat out gorgeous, you’re smart, kind, funny, strong. I feel safe with you… like you’d take on the world for me. You’ll have to trust me on this, you’re more than good enough. It’s just that… oh I don’t know. I’m so confused. It’s so much more complicated at this age. We’ve got more baggage, more fears. More what-ifs.”

“Why not see where this takes us?”

“I need time to think. This has all happened so fast.”

“Maybe because it’s right, and I’d hardly call fifteen years fast,” I say grumpily.

She laughs. “Let’s head on back before my nose gets frostbitten.”

“To be continued.” I say.

“Absolutely,” she agrees.

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