Page 89 of Playboy Billionaire

“I know you’re anything but that. I wanted you to know, you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s all my fault. Because of me, Noah got shot. You could have been killed. I couldn’t have lived with that.”

“You aren’t responsible for someone else’s crazy.”

“Griff, you were right about me. A part of me is shut off. I held back because of shame from my past, my guilt about the baby. I can’t give myself completely to anyone, because I’m still trying to forgive myself.”

Griffin grasped her upper arms, “You were right too. I didn’t want anyone to need me, and even more than that, I never wanted to need anyone. I still don’t. But the only way I know to fix that, is to dive in and live. I can’t fix it in my head. I’ve got to walk through the fire and experience it, make mistakes, continually course-correct, just like sailing. The wind blows you, you adjust the sails, work with the wind, instead of fighting against it. Can’t we work through this together?”

She smiled sadly, “Beautiful metaphor…I have nothing to give. Not right now. I’m heading back to my ranch to do some soul searching and get rest. I know I’m running, but it’s the best I can do right now. I’m sorry.”

Griffins voice was thick with emotion, “Can I call you in a few weeks?”

“It’s better that you don’t.”

“That’s it then…have a nice life? Does this self-imposed exile apply to Noah Davis as well?”

Her face flushed, “Thanks for making this a little easier. Goodbye Griffin.”

“Penelope, wait, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have…”

She jerked away and ran out the door not bothering to shut it behind her.

Griffin slammed the door and went to pour himself a shot.Blew it again asshole. You managed to put the final nail in the coffin.Bravo.But she’d had her mind made up well before she came to say goodbye. Maybe she’d never had any intentions of it being more than a fling. He should know about that…he’d orchestrated his entire life the same way. Karma’s a bitch.

Tomorrow couldn’t get here fast enough.

42

Josie shook her head, tsking her disapproval. “You’re too skinny. You must eat something.”

“I’m not hungry. I’ll make myself a sandwich later.”

“I’m worried about you.”

Penelope gave Josie a tight hug. Her lilting voice and the sing song rhythm always managed to sooth Penelope’s nerves. Josie was like a second mother to her and she desperately needed that right now.

“I’m leaving Archie here while I go for a ride on Raven,” she said.

“You and that horse. Chica, what am I going to do with you?”

“Just love me,” she said, her lips curving up.

“Oh, I love you alright, but I want to paddle you sometimes.”

“I’ll be back in a couple of hours.”

“You be careful. I will prepare you a big supper, and you will eat it. You hear me? And Thanksgiving, it’s next week already. Walt will have to get supplies and I have to plan the menu.”

“Is your family still joining us?”

“Yes, and Walt and his new lady friend.”

“Dolly and Ben haven’t committed yet, but I’ll try to pin them down tonight.”

Josie’s warm brown eyes stared at her with so much compassion it was nearly her undoing. Her voice choked with tears, “Thanks Josie.”

She shooed her out the door, “Go…go…before we both cry.”

Penelope let Raven have her head; they galloped through the barren meadow, the air cold and crisp. It was a sunny day which helped her mood immeasurably. Walt had tacked Raven up for her, but she hadn’t escaped without another round of troubled admonitions. It was both comforting and annoying at the same time. She wanted to lick her wounds in peace…thank you very much. She needed a minute.

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