Page 61 of Crave Me

The blankets are peeled back, but I don’t open my eyes. I go to the place I know that will keep my will to survive.

“You can pretend to sleep all you want. I know you enjoy this. This pussy doesn’t lie when it gets wet for me.”

My bottoms are pulled from my body, pain ricochets throughout, and my mind floats away as it dissociates.Someday I’ll be away from this hell, someday I’ll be married, I’ll have a man who loves me, who protects me, who will make me feel safe and secure. We’ll have a house in the woods, just the two of us, madly in love. I’ll be successful, happy, and loved for once in my life, and none of this will matter anymore ...

I wake heaving in breaths, looking frantically around my room as tears pool in my eyes, wishing like hell I could escape these nightmares. I lay back down into my blanket cocoon, steadying my breathing and trying to relax. I can’t help but crave the warmth, safety, and comfort Dallas brings me.

Maybe I should have let him stay after all.

Chapter Twenty-One

Dallas

When I wake up the next morning, I have a plan in place to show Blaire that I’m not going anywhere. I shower and get ready for work, dressing in a pair of denim jeans and a button-up shirt, and pull on my boots as I slip out the door. The drive into town this early in the morning is always beautiful, and I know that I take it for granted. Being born and raised in Aspen Ridge, with the mountains surrounding our town, I got used to them hovering over our existence.

Today the sun is peeking over the mountain range, casting a bright reflective glare off the snow in front of me. We’re typically under constant cloud cover, which I thrive in, but the sun is welcome. I wonder what Blaire prefers. I pull onto Main Street and into a parking spot before pulling out my phone to text Sawyer.

Me:

Walking into Bean Haven. You want anything?

Sawyer:

Nah. Was already there this morning.

How fucking early does he go in to work? I grab what I need from Hannah and head to the distillery, slightly nervous about surprising Blaire but knowing that I need to do this. I want this woman to realize that she isn’t alone anymore, that I want to take care of her—that I enjoy it. The drive to work goes by in a blur, the roads still heavily caked with dirt and salt.

I stop by my desk, grab a Sharpie, and write on the side of her cup.

Not pumpkin spice

Picking up her chocolate croissant, I head to her office in hopes of beating her there. I knock softly on the door, and when I don’t hear anything, I hesitantly open it. Free of her beautiful face, I slip into her office and leave her black coffee and pastry on the center of her desk before slinking back out and shutting the door softly behind me. Once back in my office, I settle into my chair and open my laptop to get to work when my phone chimes with an incoming text. My heart flips in my chest as I anticipate a text from Blaire about the surprise I left her, but it isn’t her. My face falls in disappointment.

Ivy was added to the chat

Me:

What is this blasphemy?

Sawyer:

Be fucking nice, dickhead

Kins:

Aww, sis! Why didn’t I think to add you to this?

Carter:

Cause you’re too busy with a bunch of snot nosed kids all day

Kins:

Har-har. And why didn’t you add her, lover boy? Too busy getting your rocks off?

Carter:

Kins:

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