Page 54 of Crave Me

“Fine, princess. You win. Again. But I’m only going to follow you home so I know you got there okay. The roads are still shit.”

Her eyes go wide for a split second, and if I hadn’t glanced at her in that moment, I would have missed it.

What the fuck is she hiding?

Chapter Eighteen

Blaire

Dallas drops me off at the distillery to pick up my car, only to find it buried under an exorbitant amount of snow. He forces me to sit in his warm car while he works to clean mine off and get it warmed up for me. When it’s clear of all snow, he opens the passenger side door and helps me climb out of it.

“I’m good to go?”

“I’m following you, but yeah, it’s running and warm now.”

“You didn’t have to do that, but thank you.”

“I wanted to, Blaire. Now get in the car where it’s warm, and drive slow.”

I get settled in my car, feeling a mix of emotions, but thankful for all of his hard work, and pull out of the lot. I take it slow, Dallas behind me in his souped-up Audi. The snow is piled high on the side of the road from being plowed recently. Gray clouds cover the sky from the sun, blocking any view of the mountains, and the tall Sitka spruce trees are heavily blanked with a thick layer of fluffy white snow, making everything look like a true winter wonderland. I’m thankful for the salt on the roads as I navigate back into town, but I still drive at a crawling pace.

Dallas is such an enigma. This brute of a man can be so compassionate and caring. A natural caretaker. My face flamesat the reminder of him cleaning me up after sex, no matter how many times I told him I could do it myself. When he explained it was part of the dynamic, and that it makes him feel good to take care of me after and it gives him the opportunity to check in with me, it was hard not to swoon. He’s so much easier to deal with when he’s being a dick. I know what I’m getting and can handle myself. But when he’s almost . . . loving? I’m at a loss. Letting him comfort me after my nightmare last night was a weak moment that I won’t let myself repeat. I can’t let him find out that I lied to him and Sawyer. And even if I could get over that part, it would change everything.

Dallas would regret everything we’ve done, he’d look at me differently, and worst of all? He’d handle me with kid gloves. It took me years, and lots of therapy through college, to learn and accept that what happened to me was just that. Something tragic and awful that happenedtome, through no fault of my own. Someone who was supposed to be my caretaker, my safe space, exploited me and took advantage of their position of power over me in the worst way possible. I wasn’t in control of what happened to me, but I am now, and I’ll be damned if I let that evil bastard claim any more power over me and my future. I don’t have a place for anyone who doesn’t support that. It’s bad enough that he still haunts my nightmares.

I know Dallas would look at me with pity, and he definitely wouldn’t go all Dom on me. Not that I’m planning to repeat anything that’s happened between us. But I’m positive he would recoil from me quickly, and I can’t possibly survive that. Not after how he made me feel over the last few days. Which I still don’t understand.

I take the turn for Main Street and I’m sure Dallas assumes I live on the other side of town. I drive past Rogue, refusing to let him know that I live in a rented studio above a tattoo shop, and instead pull into the only empty spot in front of Bean Haven. Iturn off my car and climb out to see Dallas parked behind me, his arm resting on his rolled-down window.

“What do you think you’re doing, Blaire?”

“What’s it look like? Getting coffee. In case you don’t remember, I didn’t get to drink mine at your place.”

I swear to all things holy the man growls at me. Actually growls.

“Wait here for me. I’m going to park around back.”

“No! No. Absolutely not. I’m not going to walk into Bean Haven with you. Especially not in the morning. Please just go, Dallas. I’m good. I’m a big girl. I don’t need a knight in shining armor. I’ll see you at work.”

He drops his head in defeat and my heart stutters in my chest uncontrollably. When he meets my eyes again, he looks almost hurt. But this is Dallas we’re talking about here. That’s impossible. Right?

“Alright. Be safe. I’ll see you at work.”

I nod to him before he drives off. I pull my coat tighter around me, concealing the fact that I’m wearing the clothes I had on at the party, and walk into the warmth of Bean Haven. Hannah is working behind the counter with her little girl on her hip. The coffee shop has the cutest bohemian vibe, and it feels so welcoming. The walls are a creamy off-white, while one was left with the traditional brick that the building is made of. “Bean Haven” is painted in a gorgeous loopy font above the counter in the prettiest green. Live plants hang from the ceiling in some of the corners, while others are in huge wicker planter baskets that she’s draped Christmas lights over. There are four booths that line the wall across from the display case and register and one small table for two, where Ms. Nettie sits when it’s too cold for her to sit outside. I walk up to the display case, which is surprisingly already filled with Hannah’s mouthwatering creations.

“Morning, Hannah. Hi, little one.” Hannah’s three-year-old daughter, Charlotte jerks away from me, flipping her head the other way. Hannah bounces her on her hip and rubs her back.

“Don’t mind her, she is so grumpy today. I had no one to watch her this morning so she’s been up since four with me so I could bake.”

“Oh, Hannah, that’s so hard. That’s an early morning. Hopefully she’ll nap for you?”

“I can only hope. How are things with you? Survived the snowstorm I see. You look good.”

I know my cheeks pinken when I realize that I must have that “freshly fucked” look going on, and I’m suddenly very conscious of the fact that I’m not wearing any panties. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to replicate the kind of sexual chemistry I found with Dallas. It has to be that once-in-a-lifetime kind of thing.

“I did. I love winter, and the break from life was pretty perfect. You guys do okay?”

“Oh yeah, we’re good over here. I agree, the break was nice. You settling in and finding your groove here?” she asks. She’s so damn sweet and genuinely seems interested in getting to know me.

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