Page 70 of Tis the Season to be Bullied

“If you were fucked in the head, do you think you’d know it right away?”

My hackles rise, but I do my best to keep my expression disinterested. “Like, if you went insane?”

“Yeah, sure. Like that. Do you think you’d know?”

I bring up my leg, but I put it down when I realize I was going to start rubbing my ankle. “It depends. If you’re schizo, then probably not. Because it’s so real to you, and you’d commonly start to disassociate.”

“So your friends wouldn’t pick up on it either?” he adds.

We’ve all learned a few things about the human mind. While I find it fascinating enough to possibly get my Masters in it one day, the Brotherhood approach it like other guys might football. Something we’re all familiar with, and it passes the time.

“Depends on the level of the delusions you suffer. Bipolar, that’s a different story. Relationships are the first to suffer, because you’re not exactly antisocial. Borderline?—”

“I almost fucked her.”

My head dips forward before I can straighten my neck. “Her…Trinity?” My eyebrows shoot up to my fucking hairline.

After Ispecificallyfucking forbade him from?—

“It was before you said anything. She just got here.” Cassius scrapes his nails over his buzz cut. “Before we knew she was…important.”

I force myself to take a deep breath. “But you didn’t, right?”

He stays quiet.

“Right?”

“I almost did.”

“But you didn’t.”

“No.”

“Then we’re fine.”

I didn’t say he was fine. He wasn’t.

None of us were.

“I’m sorry.”

“You didn’t know.”

“Yeah, but, fuuuck. Ialmost…”

My skin goes numb. I wasn’t listening right. I thought he was feeling guilty about my command not to sleep with Trinity before we’d figured out if she were a threat or not…but that wasn’t it, was it?

“Cass.”

“Yeah, I fucking know.” He sits up in a rush. “Jesus.” He scratches at his scalp with his nails.

I put a hand on his knee. “That doesn’t mean you’re…”

What the fuck am I supposed to say? He almost raped her, and I’m supposed to tell him everything’s okay? I might sound like I know shit, but I don’t have a fucking clue if this means he’s a cunt hair away from becoming a serial rapist or if he’s as frustrated as the rest of us.

Would anyone know?

Is the brain truly that predictable?

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