Page 439 of Tis the Season to be Bullied

Jude

It’s times like this I wish I had more friends. The last place I want to be is at home, but when Alex doesn’t answer my call as I’m driving back to Dearth Manor, there’s no one else I can turn to.Come to think of it, I didn’t see Alex in the locker room. I could have missed him, I guess.

Dad made it clear I was to come straight home anyway. What was the point in fighting him on that?

I sit in the Range Rover while the rest of my family pile out of Dad’s Audi. Rosie is crying, and I swear that breaks my heart more than even the thought that I might be expelled next week.

Ha,might?

It’s a fucking definite. And I don’t know if that makes it worse or not, knowing, but it gives me something. An advantage, maybe? For the next three days, only me and Harper know what my future holds.

Harper.

I go cold just thinking of her. Fucking bitch played me. She played me so well, a part of me is silently congratulating her. Only a small part. The rest is already plotting how to destroy her.I held back in the past. I was going easy on her. Because she’s a girl, because she’s my sister. I dunno, because I was a fucking pussy.

That ends today.

She’s stolen the sole reason for my existence. Football, my university scholarship...up in flames. And she’s holding the match, fucking winking at me.

Please, Jude.

Yeah, Harper. I hear you. You’re begging me to put you in your place. Ihearyou, princess.

Don’t worry. Your day of reckoning is coming.

“Can I talk to you?” My voice is gravelly. I haven’t had a sip to drink all morning except for my cup of coffee.

Dad looks up from the kitchen countertop. I thought he’d been busy on his phone, but he’d just been leaning on his hands, staring at the marble. When he looks at me, it’s like he’s surfacing from a daydream. “Yes, of course, son.”

His gentle tone catches me off guard. I stand in the entrance to the kitchen for a second, not sure what to say anymore. I’d been expecting harsh words, perhaps an order for me to go to my room and not come out until the test came back.

I almost want to tell him everything.Everything.About the dreams, the resentment, the enmity. About Harper, and what we did in the dark last night, how badly we both fucked up.

But something stops me. Self-preservation, probably.

I drag one of the kitchen stools closer to his and sit down, swallow, muss up my hair.

“This shouldn’t have happened,” I tell him. “The last thing I ever wanted to do was disappoint you.”

He studies me for a long moment, and I do my best to maintain eye contact. It’s difficult though. The longer I stare at him, the more aware I am of how old he’s gotten. The wrinkles around his eyes, thinning lips, receding hairline.

“What did you want, Jude?” Dad’s dark brown eyes narrow. “Did you want me to be miserable the rest of my life? To never have someone at my side again?” His eyes are watery now, like he’s about to start crying.

My chest closes up. I can’t speak, so I shake my head.

“I loved her as much as you did. More. She was my fu—she was my wife, Jude. You’re not the only one who lost someone that day. But all you lost was a mother. I lost a wife, a lover. And my best friend.”

Pressure builds in my head. “Dad, I didn’t?—”

“What would she say about all of this? About your bad attitude? The things you say about your sister? Thedrugs?”

I have to look away. It’s too painful. Because now I can’t get the image of my mother’s kind eyes out of my head. I was such a good kid back then. I never fucked up. I can’t even imagine how she’d react if Dad’s disappointment is anything to go by. How it would distort her lovely face into something...ugly. Something alien.

“I fucked up,” I mumble, trying desperately not to let the dark emotions inside me spill out. “And I’m sorry for that. But it’s not all my fault, Dad.” I grab his wrist, but I hold him gently so he doesn’t think I’ll try and hurt him again. “You have to believe me, please.”

“Then whose fault is it?” He ducks his head to look me in the eyes, because I’ve bowed my head. “Are you going to try and pin this on Harper?”

“I—” My voice catches hard, and I fight back an angry sob. I pour every ounce of willpower into keeping my defenses up,making sure I don’t break down in front of my dad and lose whatever shred of respect he still has for me.

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