Page 113 of Forbidden Lessons

I’m so busy keeping other stuff out of my head, Professor Rooke sidles in like he has every right to be there.

The soft, warm fabric of his hoodie.

The scent of his body wash on my skin.

“Hush, sweet girl.”

The way his tongue felt when it slid over my skin?—

I slam on brakes, and the car behind me hoots as it swerves around me.

My hands are white knuckled on the steering wheel, and I’m trembling as I detach one to flick on the hazard lights.

Jesus, Haven. How about we stick to fucking reality for a bit?

I slap my hands on my cheeks like I’m trying to wake myself up.

Again. A little harder. Until they’re stinging.

Youcannotfuck your professor.

Youwill notfuck your bully.

Haven Lee is a good girl, and all she’s interested in is creating the best damn life she can for herself.

“Haven Lee is a good girl,” I whisper to myself as I blink back tears.

My hand is still shaking as I switch off the hazard lights and accelerate down the road. But at least all those nasty, dirty thoughts have fled.

I arrive at the diner an hour before my shift starts. I smear some foundation on my neck and help myself to a half-eaten burger off a plate that’s waiting to be washed. Then I slip into the tiny, cramped staff room to read Professor Rooke’s notes while I fill the void in my stomach left behind by the rocky road that’s now only a fond memory.

My professor starts off with new material. A fascinating study conducted by psychologist Stanley Milgram, where authority figures instructed participants to electrocute test subjects at increasingly dangerous voltages.

The twist was, they didn’t know the test subjects were actors, or that the machine they were using was a dud.

Some admitted they figured it out. Maybe the acting was a little too theatrical, but most had no idea that they weren’t doing real harm to a stranger…just because someone in a uniform told them to.

Professor Rooke states that the illusion of authority creates as strong a power dynamic between individuals as does actual authority.

But this perception of power can be influenced just as readily with the introduction of knowledge and manipulation, especially in the form of blackmail.

And fuck, that sends a very real shiver down my fucking spine. It’s like Bastian was with me and Kai the whole of yesterday, watching over us like a demented god.

Professor Rooke’s study material ends with a group discussion focused on identifying what circumstances might cause a shift in the power dynamics between people.

Guess I’ll be missing that.

But in a way, I’m glad.

I pored over my grant application at the beginning of the year to make sure it was perfect before I submitted it to AHC. And while it mentioned that there were prerequisite courses for maintaining the grant, I could never have imagined one of them would be a class like this.

But since I’m majoring in social work, I guess I’ll need to know how things like authority and power dynamics work.

Maybe then I could figure out why Professor Rooke thought he had to do a background check on me.

I can’t believe he went to my uncle’s house. What worries me even more is that my dad isn’t there anymore.

Was that the end of his snooping? Or did he try to find my high school records? Middle school? How far back did he go?