Page 110 of Deliver us from Evil

That’swhat this is about.

“Rube, it’s not our fault. It’s notherfault. It’s theirs. Whoever took her. They initiated it, not us.”

“Would have had a hard time initiating anything if—”

I bang my fist on his thigh. “We’re going to find her. And we’re going to kill whoever took her, like we should have Gabriel.”

Rube is silent for more than a beat, so I look up at him. He’s frowning. “You don’t think it was Gabriel?”

I spread my hands like a prophet. “You really think it was?”

“Everything points to—”

“Exactly. Everythingalwayspoints to him.”

Rube’s frown grows deeper. When he speaks, it’s slowly and carefully. “Yes, because he was the Guardian, and—”

He cuts off when I shake my head. “You know what. You’re right. Maybe it would be better if our memories were erased because we always storm in without thinking things through. We’re so consumed with rage, and hate, and revenge, we don’t ever stop to just…think.”

“You believe Gabriel was set up?”

I lay my hands in my lap, palms up, one on top of the other. I’ve been trying to meditate and shit—my therapist recommended it—but the only thing that happens when I close my eyes is that I’m immediately transported back to the basement.

It’s always been the case.

Which is why I get so little sleep. It takes a lot of effort to convince myself that I won’t wake up with some guy’s hand down my fucking pants.

“I don’t know what to believe anymore,” I tell him. “And I don’t know where Trinity is. And I don’t know if we’ll ever find her.”

I see Rube’s shoulders sag in my peripheral view.

“Maybe they’ll find something,” Rube says. “Apollo’s good with that shit.”

“It’ll have to be a fucking miracle they find.” I shake my head again. “I don’t think anything less is going to cut it. Not this—”

There’s a shriek of tires outside.

We’re up in an instant, storming to the bedroom window. It looks out on the street, to our SUV that’s just pulled up into the driveway.

Guess there’s no reason to be circumspect anymore. If anything, Ihopewe draw someone’s attention. If they come for us, at least then we’ll know who took Trinity.

Apollo jumps out of the passenger door, Cass a beat behind him. They race up to the front door.

Rube and I meet them halfway down the stairs. It’s crowded with the four of us, but that doesn’t matter.

Apollo’s holding out his phone. “Watch it,” he wheezes. “One of you—”

Cass snatches it. “Christ, Apollo, get some fucking exercise.” Then he looks at me, at Rube. “He figured out the password. He opened the file.”

“The one from Gabriel?” Rube asks, reaching for the phone.

Cass pulls it out of reach.

For a second, just oneweirdfucking second, I think he’s screwing around with Rube. That if he tried to go for it, Cass would pull it away again. Like driving away from someone before they can get in the car. But just a few feet. And then you apologize. And then do it again.

“Rube, my man,” Cass says quietly. Then he shakes his head. Looks at me. “I…don’t even know if we can.”

“Can what?” Rube growls, going for the phone again. This time Cass lets him take it.

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