Page 63 of Fearless

The only thing worse than waking up to the sex dungeon would surely be waking up to the sex dungeonandmy fucking face gawking at her.

But she stills again, and I release the breath I wasn’t aware I was holding.

She’s in pain, I think. Did I do that to her?

I don’t know, but I want to believe she’s stronger than that. Stronger than what I’ve done to her.

Her legs fall down onto my knee as I free my hand and bring it to her freckled cheek. She’s soft. Warm. Everything I’m not.

A cry escapes her lips.

I should wake her up. Save her from whatever is bothering her. But what if she still thinks I’m worse? What if I am the one bothering her?

When she jolts I realize this was a bad idea. A fucking terrible idea.

Another cry. Breath deeper. Faster. Her eyes open and for a second she just stares at me. My hand is still resting on her cheek. I should say something but nothing comes out.

She blinks and glances around the room, and I can practically feel her pulse pick up under my arm. It’s like holding a grenade in my arms and watching the pin being pulled.

Her hands reach out for something, anything. One lands on my chest and the other one on my thigh. She digs her nails in like she’s trying to hold on. Her mouth moves as if she’s choking back a scream.

“Meisie?”

I pull her into my chest and she lets go of my thigh, that hand now clinging to my shoulder. I don’t know if it’s right to cuddle her, or if that will just make it worse, but the other night it was the only thing to eventually calm her down.

Her breathing gets quicker but she’s not fighting me. Not yet. She’s just trembling.

“Meisie, you need to wake up,” I tell her.

She digs her nails in further.

I let her head roll back away from my chest and tap her on the cheek, still calling her name. Her eyes are closed now and she’s breathing so quick I’m scared she’ll pass out.

She starts to fight me.

I knew it.

Her hands are pushing me now but I’m still not sure if she knows it’s me.

Still, the pushes turn into fists, and the jabs get stronger. I look up at the ceiling while she lashes out against me, not minding it at all. These are all for free. For dragging her into this mess.

But the more she does it, the more I start to think she’s probably just hurting herself. She needs to wake the fuck up now.

I flip us over, pushing her down onto the bed. She brings her knees up, like she’s getting ready to kick me, but I push her legs apart easily and hold them down with my thighs. Her hands start clawing at my face, her eyes are open and her aim is phenomenal, but I quickly push her wrists down into the mattress.

“Enough!” I slam her wrists down again and she lets out a massive sigh.

She stares up at me, her mouth open and her breath hitting my cheeks. “I’m awake.”Gasp. “I’m awake.”Gasp.

I don’t know if I should believe her so I don’t move. Not yet.

“You sure?”

“I’m awake,” she says, nodding her head. Her tongue peeks out to wet her lips and then she bites down on her lower lip.

“You’re awake but are you… good?”

I can’t think of a better word to describe it thangood. Is she in the fucking room with me or is she still away with the fairies?