Page 55 of Fearless

And at the center is Cole.

Crazy eyes in a manic mask.

I sway back, but Cillian’s already there to steady me. “Meisie,” he says.

Not,are you okay?

Not,what’s wrong?

Just,Meisie. Because we both know I’m not okay. We both know this is wrong. I shouldn’t be here. Maybe I shouldneverhave been here.

But now that Cole’s seen me…now that I’m on his radar…

Dimly, I hear the girl say something like, “Is she okay?” but it’s all just background noise compared to the buzz flooding my ears.

Cillian grabs me in a fierce hug, so tight that what little air I had in my lungs whooshes out. It should be suffocating, terrifying, mortifying…

It’s not. It’s comforting. When I’m wrapped in his strong arms, nothing can hurt me. Just for a moment, I’m untouchable too.

My toes curl into the carpet. The walls retreat. Cillian releases me.

Cole flicks his bag of good feels onto the table and stands, stretching like a lazy cat.

“Strange,” Cole says half to himself as he stalks around the table toward us. “And here I thought you look like a girl who knows all about having a good time.”

I try and step back, but Cillian’s there. So I cringe into him as Cole closes the distance, mentally begging Cillian to wrap his arms around me again and protect me.

But this time he doesn’t.

He lets his twin brother walk right up to me. Cruel fingers pinch my chin and yank my head up, bringing tears to my eyes.

“Guess I was wrong,” Cole says, wrinkling his handsome face in disgust. “You’re just like your cunt mother after all.”

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

CILLIAN

His hands are on her.

His fucking hands are touching her and I don’t like it.

I don’t like anything about this situation. I thought I was prepared for it. I thought I knew what would happen—it’s happened many times before. The moment a girl, any girl, realizes there’re two of us. Realizes she could take her pick. She could have either. Maybe she could have both at once? That’s always a lip-biting moment before her hopes of a threesome are dashed and she chooses Cole because, hey, at least Cole was up for it, right?

I knew that would happen and I told myself I wouldn’t care.

Business. That’s what it is. That’s all it ever can be.

When I came in and found her playing in her little fort. Fuck. There is no denying that was adorable as shit. And I’m not a man who finds things adorable but for whatever reason, she amuses me. She makes me forget, temporarily, that I have to be switched off. That everything needs to be black and white.

Lying in that stupid fucking fort with her I started to think maybe gray wasn’t so bad. Let’s face it, there was nothing appropriate about the thoughts I was having. There’s nothing appropriate about any of this. We’re chalk and fucking cheese. She’s immature and some fucked up mix of bratty and innocent… pampered as a princess but somehow still broken. She giggles and she cries, and she does both like she means them. And me? I constantly feel like an old man at the end of his life, a tired, used-up war veteran just begging to catch pneumonia or some shit so I don’t need to wake up and keep my own conscience in a box.

Meisie has nightmares? I don’t even dream.

Meisie acts like a child? I don’t even know what being a child means.

We don’t mix.

We’re not suited.

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