“I had no intentions of leaving my home, but I didn’t feel safe there either. I wasn’t actively looking for an out, but then I was contacted by the university. One of the higher-ups read my dissertation, liked my ideas, and wanted me to take over a section of their Early Childhood Education Department.”

“Just like that?”

“Just like that. Jess calls it divine intervention. Everything worked out so smoothly, like it was meant to be or something. I finished up my school year in Georgia and headed out here.”

33

Jax

Anger courses through me as I pace back and forth in my living room. I’m pissed that Aly wasted so much time on this asshole and that he harassed her when she tried to break free. At the same time, I’m proud of her for finally cutting those ties.

Aly wants to see the good in people; I know that’s why she let her ex back into her life so many times. Her ex mistook her kindness for weakness. Aly is no weakling, but I’m not sure she fully believes that. On top of it all, she had no support system with Jess moving out of state and Jacob traveling all the time. It kills me to think her parents don’t even have ties with her. Thinking of how she handled that part of her life with little support makes me even more grateful for my family. They rallied around me not only through the divorce but my recovery as well.

“Umm… I believe you owe me a story.”

In the heat of everything, I forgot that I promised her I would tell her about what happened to me. I sit back on the couch, close my eyes, and try to center myself. I have never opened myself up the way I’m about to right now.

“I met Maranda the summer I was sixteen. I was wrestling around with a friend and fell from his tree house. I broke my leg. It was the beginning of summer and I was super bummed that I couldn’t swim or do all the typical summer stuff with my friends. My friends brought me to the movies to try to cheer me up. She was there with her friends. I had seen her around school before, but I was so caught up in swimming, I never really gave her the time of day.”

“Until you had all the time in the world,” Aly interjects.

“Exactly.” I nod and continue, “We were together for all our junior and senior year. Life seemed good. I was accepted into my dream school for architecture. I got in on a swimming scholarship. I was on top of the world. Then Maranda got pregnant towards the end of our senior year.”

Aly’s eyebrows nearly shoot to the top of her head. I knew she wouldn’t be expecting that.

“It came as a complete shock. I mean, yeah, we were teenagers and fooled around, but I always used a condom. I had so much going for me, I didn’t want to mess it up. We told our parents. They were livid, of course. Her parents insisted we marry as soon as possible. I went along with everything because, well, it takes two, right? I wanted to do right by her. We married that May; we were both eighteen by then.

“Our parents started putting pressure on us to get our future in order,” I continue. “My dreams for college were squashed because I needed to get a job to support her and our baby. My uncle suggested I join the military since I would have a steady paycheck and insurance to take care of our family.”

“So that’s why you joined?” Aly all but whispers.

“Yup, I went to a recruiting station and left for the Navy the day after high school graduation. Maranda stayed with her parents while I went off to basic training. The baby wasn’t due until November, so I still had time to get my shit together. The plan was for me to get through basic training, receive my orders, and then have her come with me to my duty station once the baby was born.”

“Sounds like you were highly prepared for being so young.” Aly tucks her legs underneath her body.

“Yeah, that’s the crazy part. I was scared shitless to be a young dad, but I was also kind of pumped too. I had a great childhood growing up and amazing role models. I was determined to be the best dad I could be.”

“So, what happened?”

“Maranda had the baby—a little girl. We decided on the name Kinley. It took about two weeks before I was able to get paternity leave and fly out to be with them. She was able to send me pictures and videos, but something about the baby…” I shake my head. “Something wasn’t right.”

Aly cocks her head to the side in confusion.

“I felt no connection to this child. I thought maybe I would feel differently once I met her in person. I got home and the moment they put the baby in my arms, I felt…nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“Nope.” I take a long breath. “My dad and Pop had told me that the first time they held each of their children, something came over them. They described it as this astounding otherworldly feeling, this sense of wonderment that they had helped bring a child into this world, and I felt absolutely nothing.”

I study Aly and watch her face as she begins to put the pieces together. She opens her mouth and shuts it several times before she says, “The baby wasn’t yours, was it?”

“No.” I shake my head.

“Did she know you weren’t the father?”

“The truth came out when I asked her for a paternity test. Apparently, she and her brother’s best friend weren’t using any protection while she was cheating on me. She told me that she hoped I was the father since I was the responsible one.”

“I’m so sorry.” I can see the tears welling in those big blue eyes of hers.