Page 4 of Forever My Boy

We order and pay, and then head to the mall. We have a list of things we need. I swear it’s like moving to an apartment, only we won’t have a kitchen or a bathroom, but still need those essentials.

Our first stop is Kmart. I really hate this store, but things are cheap and when you’re on a super tight budget, cheap is your friend. We’re not in the store for five minutes when the blue light siren sounds and we’re sprinting toward the bathroom accessories to get our towels on sale.

Katelyn may or may not have pushed someone out of the way to get the last set of black towels. She said they’ll hide Mason’s dirt better, which leaves me with questions. First, why is he using her towels and not his? Second, does he even own damn towels? Third . . . well I’m sure there’s a third, fourth, and fifth but I’m too frustrated at the situation to move past the first two.

After the towels, we grab all our shower needs, including those ugly shower shoes. When I went shopping with Liam, he made me promise to wear them all the time because he likes my toes and would hate to see me lose one to some type of fungus.

I pick up new bottles of my shampoo and conditioner, and a couple bars of soap to go in the caddy we found in the “Back to School” section. I never looked to closely there before, but they have dorm room supplies and decorating ideas.

Katelyn and I decide we’re going to decorate our room with posters of some of the bands we like and I’m going to ask Liam tosend me a University of Texas pennant for my wall, as well as a shirt or two. Preferably one he’s worn because it’ll smell like him and the one I have now barely holds his scent.

God, I miss him. Talking to him on the phone doesn’t do my heart justice. I need to see him, touch him, and feel his body against mine. I miss him nuzzling against my neck and holding me against his chest. Those are things I took for granted when we were together daily, and now that he’s gone, doing his thing in Texas, I yearn for them. For him. The physical ache I feel when we get off the phone is debilitating at times. I don’t know how I’m going to last four years without seeing Liam every day.

After we finish shopping, Katelyn drives me back to my house and helps me unload everything into my room. I’ve packed some stuff, mostly clothes and anything Liam has ever given me. There’s no way in hell I’m going to leave something behind.

Katelyn stays for dinner and well into the night because being at my house is better than hers, even though mine isn’t great. Mason is the only one of the four of us who has amazing parents. If I could live there, I would. The Powells’ is warm and inviting, the door is always open, and Mason’s mom loves to cook. If he had a pool, we’d never leave his house.

After Katelyn leaves, I spend some time organizing the things I bought for our dorm room. I wash the towels, the extra-long sheets, and the new quilt I happened to find with some of the University of Texas’s colors in the flowers. They’re a little darker than what the rest of our flower décor looks like, but who cares.

Once I put everything in the dryer, I hop in the shower. Normally, I shower in the morning but tonight I need the hard water pressure to ease the stress I have in my neck. I never understood this until Liam explained how this is as good as a massage. Still, I much prefer his hands on me. After standingunder the water for who knows how long, I get out. The hot water eased some of the tension, but not enough.

Outside the bathroom door, my mom stands there, wringing her hands.

“What?”

“Nothing,” she says. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” I say a bit sarcastically.

“I was thinking. Maybe tomorrow I can take you shopping for some new clothes. Just like we used to.”

“Okay,” I tell her. I’m not about to pass up new clothes, especially if she’s paying.

“Okay, good night.”

“Night.” Back in my room, I dry off, get dressed and crawl into bed. As soon as my head hits the pillow, I know I’m not long for this world.

My phone rings and even though the ringer is on the lowest setting, it scares the shit out of me. Blindly, I reach for the cradle and lift it from the receiver. “Hello?” My voice is hoarse, groggily.

“Hey, baby,” Liam says on the other end. Hearing him causes me to sit up straight and rub the sleep from my eyes. “I’m sorry I woke you.”

“It’s okay. What’s going on?”

“Nothing . . . I just.” Liam pauses and takes a deep breath. “I can’t?—”

“Are you okay?”

“No,” he says quietly. “I need to come see you.”

Who am I to say no?

“What about football practice?”

Liam goes silent and I fear I’ve said something to upset him or there’s someone in his room right now. The last I knew, he didn’t have a roommate, thanks to Mason, so he should be allalone. I shake my head, clearing the last thought away. Liam wouldn’t cheat.

“Josie, I need to see you,” he says. “It’s been six weeks, and I can’t . . . you don’t . . . I need you, Jojo. I’m leaving now.”

Before I can protest or ask him to wait until the weekend, he hangs up. I try to call him back, but my call goes to voicemail.

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