Page 42 of Keep Me In Your Heart

Just as I burst out of my room, I nearly knock someone over in the hallway. It takes me a moment to register that the petite woman isn’t Sylvie.

It’s Claire.

My hands fly from her shoulders, where I held her to keep from bowling her over.

“I’m sorry,” I stammer.

“It’s okay,” she replies uncomfortably.

“I didn’t see you there.”

“I was just…poking around,” she replies. Her eyes stay on my face as I back against the wall, putting as much space between us as possible. Then I quickly scan the periphery of the hall to realize she and I are alone.

My lungs hold my breath, my gaze raking over her face.

“How are you?” she whispers.

I force myself to swallow.

“Fine,” I mutter quietly.

It’s clear she expects me to return the question, but I don’t. I shouldn’t be talking to her at all.

“Sylvie is really lovely,” she says, making casual conversation.

I glance around again, wondering where my wife is at the moment.

“Where is she?” I mumble.

“She’s downstairs,” Claire whispers so softly I can barely hear it. “Everyone is.”

My eyes lift to her face again. My feelings are so conflicted and hard to describe.

“Claire…” I start, trying to back away even more, but for some reason, she sees this as an invitation to step even closer.

“I’ve missed you.”

I force in a deep breath. There’s a part of me that’s dying to tell her I don’t think about her at all. And when I do, it’s only when I’m drunk, and my demons show up to remind me what a liar and bad friend I am.

“What about Angus?” I murmur in question.

“I love Angus,” she replies as if it’s obvious. “But there will always be a part of me that…”

She reaches out and rests her fingers against my chest.

Fuck.Fuck. Fuck.

“Angus can’t please me the way you do, Killian.”

I can’t breathe.

“I told you it was over,” I reply softly. “You shouldn’t be here. You’re married to one of my best friends.”

She takes another step closer. “I thought this was why you invited us.”

“I invited you all here to meet mywife.” If only I could just tell her the only damn reason I had this fucking party at all was to prove to the world that I’m not a fucking mess and that I have a happy marriage.

I can’t even pretend I’m all right.

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