Page 42 of An Uncertain Claim

Her eyes danced with amusement, and she patted my shoulder before returning to her seat. “We clearly haven’t spent enough time together.”

“I guess not,” I agreed with a laugh. The time I’d spent with her had been fun and relaxing. I hadn’t felt pressure to be anyone but myself and she’d treated me like family from the moment we met. If I left, I had a feeling I would miss her. The fact that we’d always be in each other’s lives through the baby made that a little easier to swallow.

If?

The thought knocked me off balance for a moment.IfI left?Huh. Well, that’s new.When had I begun considering staying? Or was it simply the mating instinct? Confusion swirled inside me, stirring up plenty of questions, but no answers. Thinking logically was difficult when my physical hunger for Nathan was so strong and my panther constantly urged me to capitulate. I needed to be able to work through this and the only way was to keep some distance between myself and Nathan until I’d sorted out what I wanted. Otherwise, I’d never be able to trust that my decisions hadn’t been a result of passion rather than logic.

Chapter Twenty

Nathan

“Dad,” I greeted as I walked into the den. My mother had decorated this room just for us when they built the house and it held some of my best memories. The floor was a set of platforms—essentially theatre seating. There was a large, overstuffed couch on the bottom level, as well as floor cushions that people used when all the seats were taken. The next two platforms had three recliners on each one, all with cup holders and trays. Everything was strategically set up so that there were no seats with an obstructed view of the massive television hanging on the wall like a movie screen. She’d had special lighting and a killer surround sound system installed. Wisely, she’d also soundproofed the room, so I was surprised at the low volume of the television as I took a seat on the couch. Damn, this thing was comfortable. I hadn’t been sleeping much lately and as my body relaxed, I realized just how exhausted I was. My wolf didn’t give a fuck what was going on with me though, he was still feeling cocky and excited, focused on the fact that he’d finally gotten his teeth into Peyton again.

“I take it you’ve moved along in the mating?” he asked, glancing at me before returning his eyes to the screen and the professional game he was watching. Then he yelled at the ref’s call and the sportscasters analyzing the game.

I’d inherited his love of sports, but even I had my limits, so it made me chuckle when I saw it was a professional pickleball match. I’d have to ask him later how the hell he’d found a televised game.

“Yeah,” I answered as I stretched out my long legs and set my feet on an ottoman, crossing them at the ankles. My arms spread along the back of the sofa and I dropped my head back. “I got caught up and…she’s not exactly thrilled about it. But at least she’s not enraged any more. She was clearly contemplating damaging my balls.” I winced at the memory of her expression. “She’d have done it too.”

My dad laughed and muted the sound on the TV before shifting around to face me. “I don’t doubt it. You’re bigger, but that girl is scrappy.” His gaze strayed in the direction of the kitchen for a moment, as if he could see through the walls. “She’s deadly too, isn’t she?” His silver eyes—the ones I’d inherited—returned to my face. I nodded and he grinned. “Quite a woman you got yourself, son. Now you just have to figure out how to keep her.”

I sighed and folded my hands behind my head. “Speaking of mating,” I said, moving away from the maddening subject of convincing Peyton to accept our mating. “When she accepted the mark, we connected emotionally and I felt her presence appear in the pack web, but there’s something odd—”

“You can’t hear her like everyone else,” my dad stated knowingly.

I’d been irritated when I discovered I didn’t have access to Peyton’s mind. I hadn’t bitten her with that purpose in mind, but when I’d realized what happened, I’d felt a surge of relief because I’d finally be able to learn all of Peyton’s secrets. I’d be able to understand her reluctance to mate, which would help me strategize the best way to make her stay. Then I’d searched for her mind and while I knew she was there, and I could feel her emotions, there was a wall blocking my access to her thoughts. I didn’t like it, especially when she wasn’t with me. She was just in the other room, but the distance bothered me. And my wolf had decided to return to the living just to pester me because he wanted to go to her. “Shouldn’t I be able to?” I asked.

“No.”

I gaped at my dad. “What the fuck do you mean, no?” I’d come to him hoping he’d tell me how to fix the predicament.

“Relax, Nate. It’s only temporary. For some reason, Alphas are blocked from their mate’s mind. Once you’ve completed the mating, you’ll have the same mental link that all fully mated couples do.”

“You have to be fucking kidding me,” I growled.

My dad raised his eyebrows and cocked his head to the side. “I take it you were counting on this development?”

“Not counting on it exactly, since I hadn’t planned to bite her, but it certainly crossed my mind that it would make everything a little easier.”

“Nothing that’s worth it is ever easy, Nathan. You’ve learned that lesson enough times with your crusades. I’m surprised you were looking for the easy way out.”

I grunted and brought my arms down, crossing them over my chest. “That’s bullshit and you know it, Dad. You were always the first person to tell me that if the cause was worthy, I should use every advantage I was presented with. When it comes to Peyton, I’m prepared to do battle and if I must, I’ll play dirty. She’s mine and I’m not letting her go.”

He smirked, then glanced at his watch and stood. “Just wanted to make sure you knew that. Because love is a fucking battle, and you need to arm yourself. Especially when your mate is as amazing and incredibly stubborn as ours are.” He looked down at me with an unreadable expression. “Have you told her everything?”

I hesitated, knowing he was going to lecture me about keeping shit from my mate. Other than Tanner—who knew it all—my dad was the only person who knew any specifics of the things I’d done. “She’s figured most of it out.”

“But you didn’t tell her.”

I shook my head.

“I doubt a bond could fully snap into place if there are big secrets between you. And I can’t imagine letting her find out through your mental link would be better than telling her yourself. Coward’s way out, son. And you’re right, you’re no coward.”

I watched him leave without another word. Most of what he’d said made sense, but he’d tripped me up with the mention of love. I cared very deeply for Peyton, but I didn’t think I loved her, although I suspected my wolf felt something more akin to it. For me, it had nothing to do with being unfamiliar with the emotion altogether. My love for our child was immeasurable and unconditional and I loved my parents fiercely as well. But what I felt for Peyton, though it was growing just as strong, was nothing like that. I hadn’t considered whether the difference stemmed from it being a different kind of love.

For the first time, I wondered if that might be the major problem I was facing with Peyton. She wasn’t the type to romanticize things; it was something we had in common, which was why I’d never considered it to be an issue. I couldn’t see her factoring something like love into her plans. But…what if I’d been wrong? What if the only thing that would convince her to stay was love?

No.I knew Peyton well enough to know I’d been right the first time. Even if I did love her, it wasn’t a factor that would have much sway with her. She was too logical to take it into account. We did not let emotions color our decisions. But I couldn’t shake the thoughts, they hovered in the very back, peeking out from time to time so I wouldn’t forget them entirely.

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