Page 6 of Caught By A Cowboy

“Shit! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean…”

“It’s fine.” I shake my head.

“It’s not fine at all, me and my big mouth. I’m always saying things out loud before I think them over.” I notice the heat creep up her neck. “Do you want to talk about it?” She has that sad look of pity on her face as her body curls to face mine.

“Do you want to sit here and talk about your problems?” I question her, coldly.

“I guess we’ll see what's on T.V.” She quickly picks up the remote and starts flicking through the channels, stopping when she gets to some true crime program.

Maddison does her best to pretend to be interested, but I can tell from the way she fidgets with her fingers and bites her lip that she’s thinking hard about something.

“Adam didn’t want kids,” she blurts out, closing her eyes and taking a breath. “I always thought that he did, I thought it would be the next step. I even tossed my pills away yesterday morning. But now I think back, we never spoke about it. Which is odd, don’t you think? How can you spend six years with someone and not talk about things like that?” She shakes her head in confusion. “I only figured out last night at our rehearsal dinner how he felt. His cousin’s kids were running around the tables, and I was watching them, thinking about how rewarding it must feel to be a mom. Adam turned to me and said, “Aren’t you glad we’ll never have to deal with that?”. I asked him what he meant, he just laughed and told me kids aren’t part of his plan. That’swhen I realized.” She lowers her head and plays with the hem of the shirt she’s wearing.

“You want kids?” I smile to myself as I ask her. There have been times when I’ve thought about how it would be to have a few of them running around here. But there's a dark side to me, one that very few people see. I ain’t cut out for fatherhood.

“Of course, but it wasn’t just about wanting kids. I realized in that moment that I didn’t know the man I was marrying. Suddenly, I saw everything clearly. I wasn’t marrying Adam because I loved him or because I wanted to. I was marrying him because it was convenient for everyone else. Our parents have been friends our whole lives; my father had made him a partner. Last night, I realized I had no control over my life, and this morning, I took it back.” The excitement builds in her voice, and she smiles so proudly. “I’ve lost everything, but I’ve never felt better.” She giggles.

I like how she looks when she’s smiling, I like how she looks with her feet curled up on my couch wearing my shirt. I’m even starting to like that stir she’s put inside my chest since I first set eyes on her.

MADDISON

“So, are we going open the good stuff to celebrate?” I get up and head over to the mantelpiece above the fire, picking up the bottle of bourbon he got from Sawyer’s bar earlier.

“Sure.” He gestures for me to go ahead, so I remove the stopper and drink straight from the bottle.

“Jeez, that stuff burns.” I squint my eyes as I shake my head and move back in front of him to offer the bottle.

“Not used to liquor?” He readjusts the hat he’s still wearing so his eyes are on me, then takes a hit without a flinch.

“Adam didn’t like me drinking.” I smile sadly. “Come to think of it, there's a lot of things Adam didn’t approve of.” I roll my eyes and take the bottle back. I don’t want to think about him right now. Tonight is about me, and the changes I’m making to my life.

“Really?” The handsome cowboy scrunches up his brow and scorns me with his eyes. I’d be lying if I said he wasn’t appealing. I very much appreciate the way he looks, maybe it’s because he’s so different from Adam. His arms are muscular and covered in tattoos, I’ll bet they’d be firm to touch, and I can’t seem to stop myself from imagining how the scratchy, dark stubble on his face would feel between my thighs. The way his tongue slowlywets his thick bottom lip helps me to picture that there too. Suddenly, it seems very stuffy in here.

“I guess not everyone can be perfect,” I whisper, starting to feel a little light-headed from the beer and the liquor combined.

“Well, it’s his loss. Something tells me he had something pretty damn close to it.” The sincerity in his eyes as he looks up at me puts a warmth in my chest, and suddenly those changes I’m making to my life don’t feel so scary anymore.

“This place is beautiful, have you lived here all your life?” I quickly change the subject when I feel myself getting more and more drawn to those lips. Adam is the only experience I have. I’ve never even kissed another guy, and right now that feels all kinds of pathetic.

“My father knocked down the old cabin and built it himself just after he and my mom got married. The ranch had been in his family for years, but he wanted to give her something real special.” He looks up at the rafters proudly.

“Well, it sure is special.” I follow his eyes up to the high apex ceiling, and when I move to sit back on the couch, he goes to stand up and we knock heads.

“Shit, I’m sorry.” He takes hold of my arm and steadies me to sit on the couch, and while I laugh and stroke over my forehead, his expression is serious and full of concern. It takes him a second or two but eventually, he joins in with me, picking up the bottle from the coffee table and taking back another mouthful.

“You’ll come to learn that I’m clumsy by nature, you're gonna regret hiring me, you know that?” I continue to laugh, but the smile on his lips fades.

“Somehow, I don’t think I will.” His eyes narrow and he gets all serious again. He almost looks as if he’s having some kind of epiphany.

“So, tell me something about yourself. Something fun.” I don’t want to get serious tonight. I’d resigned myself to the factthat my future was going to be pretty boring. Now, I feel like I’ve stepped inside a whole new world. Being here, and feeling so free, is giving me a real rush.

“Trust me, there ain’t nothin’ fun about me.” He gets up from the position he’s crouched in and heads toward the fireplace, picking up a packet of smokes and placing one between his lips. I’ve never really seen a man smoke close-up before, and I’m surprised at how hot Jace makes it look.

“I don’t believe that, not for a second.” I rest back on the couch and cross my legs. “In fact, you might be the most interesting person I ever met,” I admit, studying his frame as he rests one arm on the mantelpiece and strokes his forehead with his hand.

“Well, then, you can’t have met many people, darlin’.” He laughs to himself and the way his voice sounded when he called me darling puts a flutter in my stomach. He takes a few more tokes of his cigarette before he tosses it into the fire and makes his way back toward me.

“You should head to bed, you got an early start in the morning. Those bunkhouse boys will be up and wanting their breakfast before six.”