Page 126 of Butterfly Effect

“It’s…incredible. It looks like a mini version of Terra Bella.”

“Just about,” I confirm, picking one yellowed leaf from a pothos. “Dad gardens because that’s where he senses her presence, where he honors her memory, but…”

“But?”

I shake my head, unable to lie to him this time. “I’ve been trying for years, Wade.Years.It doesn’t matter how hard I work or how much my plants thrive. I can’t seem to connect with her. Every year that passes, it seems less and less likely that I ever will.”

A defeated sigh leaves me. He extends a beckoning hand. “Come here.”

Reaching back feels right, so I do.

Chapter 21

What A Good Boy

Wade

I breathein as she nuzzles my collarbone, like a black cat with claws retracted, the smell of her and the carefully curated white gardenias lulling me to the point of intoxication.

My arms boost her up and around my torso to carry her to bed.

Unkempt sheets pushed aside, I set her down in the middle, then stretch to shift my weight and flank her with my forearms. While I guide her long fingers into my hair, she exhales from her nose.

“We’re the same,” I confess.

“Are we?”

A set of short nails drags across my scalp, and I lean into it, fighting the urge to close my eyes. But I don’t want to miss a moment of her attention.

“My dad didn’t want me either.”

Her caress on my cheek and jaw cracks me open like the widening of a rift through arid soil.

“Wade.”

“You looked me up, but you didn’t find him. That’s on purpose because he wants nothing to do with me. He makes sure the world never finds his bastard.”

The strokes shorten into circles. I clasp over her hands to keep them still.

“Walton Quade. By title a Baron, by character, a flaming pile of garbage.”

Sympathy deepens the hazel streaks in her eyes to sable.

“We received a lump sum every year in exchange for our silence. He got to keep up the façade of being a perfect family man and stay in the good graces of the royals.”

I tighten my hold on her. I don’t want to let go. I don’t want her to let go.

“I only met him once. I was twelve and ended up hiding in my room while he and Maman argued over the stipend. She wanted him to take responsibility, to be an actual father, and help raise me. He called her a gold-digging whore. My mother kicked him out and told him to fuck himself with his own money.”

“Oof.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t myself when meeting your dad. Jealousy took over.”

“Seeing you with your mom triggered the same feeling in me.”

My eyes fall shut, wishing I could dispel her insecurities. “Sorry I have daddy issues.”

“And I’m sorry I have mommy issues.”

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