Page 79 of Highland Hearts Holiday Bookshop

“Och, you kids are so dramatic. Everything can be fixed. If you want it badly enough. Do you?”

“I think that I do,” I cried into her shoulder, realizing that for once, I wasn’t ambivalent about my life at all. I wanted all of this. The shop. The magick. The new friends. The man.

“Then we’ll make it work.”

It was a promise I’d have to hold on to, because in the moment, I just couldn’t see how it would. Alexander already had a wounded heart, and I’d just inadvertently stomped all over it due to my carelessness.

“I don’t know if we can.”

“Och, lass. Do you want this?” Esther pulled back and gave me a stern look. “Really think about it. Is Alexander the one you want?”

Is he? Yes.The answer came immediately.We just…fit.He nurtured when I needed it, gave me space to breathe when I craved it, and matched my quirkiness perfectly. And I’d probably shared more with him about my mom than I had anyone else. I felt like our souls completed each other. I’d found my place—and my person—to put down roots. I’d found…home.

So, yes, Esther, Alexander is the one that I want.

“He is.”

Chapter Twenty-Three

Alexander

It hurt to see her.

Despite our breakup, I had still gone to the shop twice that week to finalize the lighting and the music for the windows. I’d worked in silence, headphones on, ignoring even the Book Bitches’ attempts at getting me to chat. I had agreed to help, and I wasn’t going back on my word, but I couldn’t handle anything more.

I had to force myself not to drink in the sight of her, like a hungry man craving a meal, and did my best to focus on the task at hand. It was our last window, and after that I wouldn’t have any reason to go to the shop at all.

I could buy my books elsewhere. It wasn’t a big deal.

The final judging was today.

And I was home, with Tattie, sitting under the lean-to in his pen, while icy wind prickled my skin. I enjoyed the sting of it, because at the very least it made me feel something. I’d been existing in a cocoon of numbness since my argument with Rosie, focusing so narrowly on every task I needed to accomplish for end-of-year projects and grading at work, that I’d kept myself from feeling anything at all.

Now, as I knew everyone would be at the shop for the final window judging, and I sat here alone with Tattie, I couldn’t help but feel it all.

I was lonely.

Tattie hopped over and pecked at my shoelace, a new favorite activity of his. I never tried to approach him, but let him come to me as he was comfortable, and I realized that he was likely quite lonely too. Puffins were social animals, they mated for life, and they returned each year to not just their partners, but to where their parents lived. I wondered if Tattie’s family missed him. I had no way of knowing where his burrow was or where he’d come from, so all I could do was give him the best life possible.

I wondered if he missed Rosie too.

Because I absolutely miss the light and laughter and joy she brought to my life.

I hadn’t expected these feelings to arise, and I put the blame squarely on Rosie’s shoulders.

Whether it was fair or not.

But I’d been happy before she’d come along. I’d liked my peaceful life and then she’d barreled intomy world, all laughter and snark, and my world had gone from black and white to full color.

Tattie tugged at my lace.

“It’s not food,” I said and opened a packet of fresh herring for him that I’d brought out with me. Tattie hopped over, watching me as I filled his little toy tray that he loved, and then I handed it over to him. Delighted, he dove in, digging among the sand and pebbles for the fish. It was Tattie’s favorite enrichment exercise, and Rosie had given that to him.

Rosie might be my favorite enrichment exercise.

Groaning, I buried my face in my hands. I had been right to not start dating again. It wasn’t worth these complicated feelings.

My phone buzzed in my pocket and reaching in, I pulled it out, surprised to see my ex-wife calling. I almost didn’t answer, but since she rarely contacted me anymore, I figured it might be something important. I also knew she’d keep calling until she got what she wanted, so best to just get it out of the way.

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