Page 19 of Wrath

Nice guys finish last, I tell myself as I drive home without him.

It's two more hours before Ezra rolls back up the driveway. I know from Jenna that he left right after I did. So, I've had an hour and a half to wonder where the hell he went.

When I came in alone, I had to tell my mom I've got a headache, which will sic her on me for the next few days. But what else could I have said?

Your stepson's a total dick. He saw me almost get kissed,fucked it up, and now I want to smash his face in for giving me shit about being gay. Oh wait, but you don't know I am. Nobody knows anything about me here. And most of them never will.

I watch through the front-facing window in my bedroom as he parks behind my car in the circle drive. This window has a nifty little window seat. I don't come over here often because it's blocked by my bench press, but I realize as I watch him step out of his Jeep that it's a nice view. I can see stars over the oak trees in the front yard.

But stars aren't what draw my gaze. My eyes lock onto Ezra, who's headed toward the front steps with long, leisurely strides. He's wearing a pale shirt and walking not fast but not slow; that's all I can discern from up here.

I hear the front door open, and I creep over to my bedroom door, listening to the rise and fall of voices from down below. My mom and Carl are both chatting with him. I hear Ezra laugh, and my dick twitches at the husky sound.

Not that guy, buddy.

As Ezra's voice raises and my mom laughs like he's a damn comedian, I think of Arnie. How that might have gone were it not for Ezra and his cock block. I could have actually gotten with someone. While I'm still here in Fairplay. That’s something that I never had on my bingo card.

I’m pretty “in the closet,” and it’s not because I want to be.It’s because Fairplay’s such a small, conservative place. Coming out would be a big deal here, where lots of people still think gays are going to hell. I'll come out to Mom and Carl at some point, and when I get to college, getting D is high on my to-do list. But the idea I could have kissed a guytonight—

Suddenly, Ezra's feet are clomping up the stairs, and my face heats up at the thought of him knowing what’s on my mind. I think I hear him pause for just a second outside my door. Then he’s plodding toward his room.

His room. That'shisroom now—right beside mine. Fuck, I share a bathroom with the fucker.

I lie on my bed, my hands behind my head, and stare at the bathroom door. I think of playing some live dealer blackjack online to distract myself, but my head still hurts. I dare take a piss—after locking his door, of course—and brush my teeth, then hit the hay.

I don't know how much time has passed when I open my eyes, woken by...I hear a sound and push myself up on my elbow. What is it? It sounds like stomping. Or walking. But it’s not coming from the hall; it’s coming from behind the wall my headboard's pressed against.

So...outside.

I get up, my heartbeat throbbing in my sore forehead, and walk to the widow seat. My eyes go to the moon, the haze of clouds in front of it. And then there's a cloud…closer. Right on the other side of the window.

That fucker’s smoking on the roof.

He's dappled by the moon's light. I can see his shape, though. He's sitting with his legs stretched out in front of him, leaning back on one arm, shirtless, tilting his head back to blow smoke up at the sky.

I reach for the window, thinking I'll push it up and tell him to—I don’t know what. It doesn’t matter. Mom and Carl's room isright below mine. If I open the window, they might hear; I’m sure he’d find a way to blame me.

Then Ezra shifts his weight, and I remember something awful: there's a weak spot in that roof. I tried to climb out on it once after we first moved here. Almost fell through it myself.

I suck a long breath into my lungs…push the window up as carefully as I can. I lean out just a little, hoping I won’t spook him into falling off. Or maybe that Iwill.

"Hey…"

He turns toward me, grinning in what looks like surprise.

"Look who it is—DG. In the middle of the fuckin' night, too." He takes a drag of his smoke, blows it out. "Wanna join me for some primo nicotino?"

"What are you doing?" My voice sounds rough from just waking up.

Ezra gives me a deadpan look. "What's it look like, Einstein?"

"He wasn't the only genius, you know. At least be creative and try Aristotle or some shit."

When I hear his smoky laugh, I know I've fucked up. "Okay, DG. You would like to be called Aristotle? That's a little weird, but if you really want me to…"

"No, fuckwit. I want you to stop waking me up. Leave me alone."

He grins—and it's the mean one I've seen before. "Poor Joshua. I can leave you alone," he says in a mimicking voice.

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