Page 158 of Wrath

Mom and Carl ask if something happened with Ezra and me.

“No, nothing. At all.”

Mom calls Ezra, finding that his phone is still off. “Well, that’s strange. Maybe he went out with friends.”

And then Carl checks his phone. I watch as his face goes somber. When he looks up, it's at my mom and not me.

He makes a face as if there's something he needs to tell her, and I feel almost faint with fear.

Carl frowns from Mom to me. "I have a text from him." He says it slowly.

"And?" I snap.

I see him swallow. He looks down and then back up—right at me.

"It says that he's going back to his mom's.” The words are so slow, monotone, and I don’t understand them. “He says...he wants to move back." Carl's brow furrows as he looks at me. "Josh, did something happen?"

My body flashes hot then cold, like a light bulb that just blew. "I said no. Nothing.” I reach for his phone. “I want to see the text.”

Carl hesitates for just a second, but I snatch it away, my heart pounding so damn hard I think I’ll pass out.

‘Hi Dad. Sorry to leave without saying bye. I’ve been thinking on it and I think it’s good to finish out the year up there with Mom. For closure. Thanks for letting me stay with you. I enjoyed the time a lot. Talk soon- Love Ezra’

I stare at it till the words blur. “That…can’t be true.” I look from Carl to my mom. “That can’t be what he really said. He was just with me!”

I run upstairs and check his room—first the drawers and then under the bed, inside the box spring.

But Carl’s right. He’s fucking right, goddammit. Everything is gone.

But not his toothbrush. Not his aftershave stuff. I walk into my room, breathing so hard I can hear myself. I look at my nightstand, underneath both pillows.

Nothing.

I think of the way we dozed off. Things were okay. Things were good. I call him again…and again…and then a third time as my breath catches in my throat and tears start dripping down my cheeks.

“Hey Ezra? What’s the matter, man? I’m really worried. Please call. I don’t believe you would just go. Without some kind of…I don’t know. Did your mom find out? About us?”

As soon as I hang up, I call back. "Ez. It’s me. Are you okay? Can I come see you? Can you call me?"

I'm calling again, pacing my room, gripping the phone so hard it hurts my hand, when Mom cracks the door open.

"Josh—"

“Did you talk to him?” I ask her.

“No.”

"Then get out!"

I call again, not proud that I'm losing my shit. "Ezra, please! Please call me, angel. I don't know what I did wrong, but call me.Please. I want to know that you're okay. Ineedto."

One more time—again to voice mail. I hurl my phone at the window.

Seven

Ezra

December 10, 2018

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