Page 20 of Marcus-stiltskin

“Ella! Shania!” I call as I walk down the hall, tying my hair up into a messy bun and rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. The house is silent. A note on the fridge says,

Went to the city. I’ll bring you a snack.

It’s signed Ella, but I imagine Shania went, too. Shania is not one to stay home when adventure awaits. I head to the rarelyused back door and fight with it until it opens, only to find Willow already standing there.

“Are you stalking me?”

She brays and tries to push past me into the kitchen. “No, shoo, go home, go back to your dad.” She looks annoyed as I use my body to block the door. “Go home, Willow.”

She brays again and I shake my head, not sure what to do. Pushing her seems mean and wrong, but I cannot have a pooping machine in the house. I turn until my shoulder is the only thing sticking out the door and push her face with my side until I can get the door shut without catching her nose.

I go to the living room and look out the windows there. Sure enough all of Marcus’s donkeys, along with Freddie K are out on the front lawn. Two of the donkeys have discovered the shrubs and are munching away while Freddie K. is running circles around them, barking and trying to herd them without much luck. I can’t say I blame them. I’m not sure I’d let myself be herded by an ancient pomeranian either.

I don’t have a rope or anything I can use to lead them back. Maybe I can lure them with food? I rummage through the fridge for something remotely suitable. More Korean food, feta, a box of wine, sparkling water, soda. We haven’t gone shopping for the week and there’s nothing in there remotely suitable for donkeys. I go through every single drawer, including the neglected vegetable drawer and hit the jackpot–a huge bag of baby carrots. I grab it and head for the front door.

There is no way in hell I’m going to feed these donkeys from my hand. The thought of their giant teeth near my fingers ready to chomp away sends a shudder down my spine, so I drop a few carrots on the grass to get their attention. Freddie K runs around us in circles but has stopped barking. He sniffs a carrot, but doesn’t bite it. Instead he comes to stand by my side.

Willow is the first one brave enough to try it. She wanders over, sniffs it, picks it up, chews on it for a second, then swallows. Her brown eyes seem to ask me for more.

“It’s right here. You can have the rest if you follow me home.” I tell her and wave the bag. Unlike the horses I’ve known, she doesn’t move. Instead, she just stares at me, her tail swishing slightly back and forth. I sigh and move closer, holding a carrot out in the air until it’s close to her nose. “Come on, Willow, let’s go.”

Slowly, she starts to follow, and thankfully, the other donkeys do too, but I find myself waving the carrots in the air a few times to keep them moving because they get distracted by every single thing between our house and Marcus’s.

As if that isn’t bad enough, the burs in the grass are deep in this part of the yard. They attach to the sides and bottoms of my shoe, poking through the holes on the tops and the sides. I try to ignore it. I’m getting these donkeys back to Marcus’s without his help, without him even noticing, if I can help it.

We clomp through the overgrown grass and trees at the slowest pace imaginable. Sloths could have circled the Earth twice by the time we make it across the acre of land between our house and the fire station.

It feels like we’ll never get there when the fence appears and I can finally see the back of the firehouse. It’s a replica of the front side of the building, with the door to the living quarters closest to me and the bay doors furthest from me. Everything is closed except a regular sized door off to the far side of the bay doors. It stands open, slightly ajar.

“That’s how you escaped, huh?” I ask Willow. She just brays at me and tries to reach for the bag of carrots.

I move my hand just in time and shake my head. “Get your fuzzy butt home and then you can have your snack.” She stops and brays at me and I sigh. “Can we just keep going?”

The donkeys trudge reluctantly behind me. There’s no sign of life, no movement from any of the windows. Everything is looking good. We move across the lawn–the donkeys plodding, Freddie K half running to keep up, me taking the smallest, slowest steps possible toward the open door. We are so close I can already smell the manure. She brays again, so loud, I nearly jump.

“Willow, for the love of God, can you keep it down?” I whisper-yell at her. Freddie K. lets out what turns out to be a warning yip as I turn back in time to find the largest horse I’ve ever seen coming from the opening in the fence towards us at full speed. The bag of carrots falls from my hand as I dodge around Willow, who seems completely undisturbed by the giant horse. With my hands on Willow’s back, I use her as an equine shield as the horse skids to a stop and neighs at Willow or me, or maybe both of us. Willow is completely undisturbed by everything going on. Calmly, she reaches out for a carrot and begins to munch on it. The other donkeys come around us, gathering in to get their share of the treats.

“I’m just trying to get them home,” I tell the horse, not sure if she’s acting as a guard or just being nosy. The horse dodges around Willow and I take a step back to put distance between us, only to lose my balance and fall into what is unmistakably a pile of shit. How I hadn’t noticed it before, I’m not sure.

Freddie K. begins to yip loudly, pouncing on his paws in a way I can’t fathom given his age. Now that I’m on the ground again, the ache from Wednesday is back. Pain radiates from my tailbone up to my lower back.

I’d totally get up and run, ass pain and all, only I’m surrounded by shit. There’s nowhere to put my hands down. Ramona immediately comes over to inspect me, leaning down close and putting her nose in my face. Freddie K., bless him, shoves bravely in between us, barking at Ramona in my defense.

I hold my breath, terrified, smelly, and just generally hating life and everything that has brought me to this moment. I close my eyes and sigh. This week just keeps getting better and better.

“Ramona, get away from her,” I hear Marcus call.

I cannot catch a break. He makes a clicking noise with his tongue and the horse calms down a bit, moving back from me so Marcus can come and stand over me. His lips are a straight line. If I had to guess, I’d say he’s trying desperately not to laugh. Carefully, he leans down and picks up Freddie K., who’s calm now that Marcus has appeared.

“Sarah, do you need some help?”

I close my eyes and sigh. “Yes.”

In one smooth motion, he grasps my hand and pulls me to standing. He sucks in his lips and looks away. He’s definitely trying not to laugh. “How did–you know what, never mind. Why don’t we get you cleaned up and—”

“I can just go home and shower.” I say, backing away.

He turns back to me and raises an eyebrow. “You could, but you’d track shit throughout the house and then you’ll be cleaning the shower for weeks to get the smell out. The fire station has an old locker room with wide drains. It will be easier to clean up after you’ve showered.”