Page 35 of Purring, Presents, and Parties

She wanted to be alone with him. This was good! Eagerly he rushed to the door and through it once it slid open, Jalin a distant concern.

Yes, this was perfect! They would snuggle in her nest, and she wouldn’t leave him because he’d make her feel so safe and comfortable.

“I didn’t leave you,” she whispered, making him realize he’d spoken that thought out loud. “You left me. Talk to me, Kasium. Tell me why you don’t want to be in a relationship with me.”

He went still in the doorway to the bedroom.

“I can’t lose you,” he whispered, feeling broken.

Zuri was quiet for a few submarks. When she spoke, her tone was confused. “You’re going to lose me if you keep pushing me away. I’ve made it clear I want a real relationship with you. What’s going on here?”

He’d spent so much of his life pushing down his feelings and fears that it was hard to give them a voice. It took several tries before he managed three words that had caused so much pain in his life.

“Kasium?”

“Everyone leaves me.” He squeezed the words past his tight throat.

Zuri gave a little gasp and hugged him tight. “Tell me what happened, Kasium. Who left you?”

He tried to speak but couldn’t make a sound. Zuri petted the back of his head. “Take me to the nest. Sit down and hold me for as long as it takes. We can wait until you’re ready to talk.”

Obeying her command, he stepped into the room and onto her nest. Sinking down in the soft fluffy bedding, he crossed his legs and settled her down in his lap.

“We have all night,” she whispered. “And all day and all night again. Take all the time you need.”

Her gentle encouragement helped his throat relax, allowing him to talk.

“I grew up on a colony planet. There were only ten children in my cresh, including my sister. Most creshes are much larger, but our colony was brand new, so the population density was very low. Only a few families at first.”

“Was it good?” Zuri asked. “To grow up with fewer children?”

“Very much so,” he agreed. “The colony expected to grow quickly, so we had twelve caregivers for only ten children. Later I’d realize we were very spoiled with all the attention lavished on us. I was especially close to my sibling. We’d often spend all day side by side for lessons and exercise. Tilanus was exceptionally bright.”

“I’m sure you were both very smart,” Zuri murmured.

“I might be intelligent, but Tilanus is exceptional. She’s currently working at the singularity lab on Saliff. It’s a very prestigious position. My clan is known for producing award-winning scientists.”

“She’s still alive?” Zuri sounded surprised.

He couldn’t understand her confusion. “Very much so. She’s married to a fellow singularity specialist, and they’ve already contracted with a cresh to grow and raise their offspring.”

“Go back to the cresh on—what was the colony name?”

“Victel Colony,” he answered, remembering the colony with its silver-colored soil. The memories were bittersweet. “It didn’t grow as fast as everyone predicted. There was an issue with the soil, it was so fine that once the planet was terraformed, even the slightest wind would cause a dust storm. The terraforming engineers assured everyone that ground plants would grow quickly and stabilize the soil.”

“I bet that didn’t happen,” Zuri said. “Terraforming is tricky. It can go haywire in so many unexpected ways.”

“Yes, you would know. You grew up on an unstable terraformed planet, correct?” he asked.

“Sure did. It was a constant fight against the bog swallowing all our farms and homes,” she answered. “Did your family leave when they realized it wasn’t turning out as expected?”

“Almost everyone left,” Kasium said, trying hard to separate himself from the desolation of those years. “Two by two, all the children in the cresh left with their parents for other colonies. Soon it was only my sister and me. Our parents had been founding members of the colony and were desperate not to lose their investment. In the end they had no choice, they took my sister and left.”

Zuri jerked in his arms as if he’d pinched her. “They took your sister but not you?”

“Yes. They left me behind and paid the last caregiver working at the cresh to find me a place at another cresh on a well-established colony.”

“Wait, back up,” Zuri said, pulling away a little.

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